A Christian Only Rents a Tomb
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March 31, 2018. Holy Saturday
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Father James Swanson, LC
Liturgical note: There is no liturgy for Holy Saturday. Christian tradition has the Church waiting at the Lord’s tomb, meditating on his suffering and death. Today’s meditation is taken from the Gospel reading for Easter Sunday at the Easter Vigil. Mark 16:1-7 When the Sabbath was over, Mary Magdalene, Mary, the mother of James, and Salome bought spices so that they might go and anoint him. Very early when the sun had risen, on the first day of the week, they came to the tomb. They were saying to one another, "Who will roll back the stone for us from the entrance to the tomb?" When they looked up, they saw that the stone had been rolled back; it was very large. On entering the tomb they saw a young man sitting on the right side, clothed in a white robe, and they were utterly amazed. He said to them, "Do not be amazed! You seek Jesus of Nazareth, the crucified. He has been raised; he is not here. Behold the place where they laid him. But go and tell his disciples and Peter, ´He is going before you to Galilee; there you will see him, as he told you.´" Introductory Prayer: Jesus, You are my faithful friend in life and in death. I discover in Your rising my guarantee and hope of everlasting life. After such a show of love You deserve all my faith, all my hope and all my love. I offer these to You humbly and gratefully. You alone are the Lord of my life. You are the true purpose of my life. I long to see Your loving face, Lord, but I must wait in hope to see You in eternity. Petition: Lord, Jesus, increase my hope in You. 1. In the Middle of Darkness: Mary and the other women were without hope. Jesus was dead. The only thing left was to give him a proper burial. They had been in a rush on Friday evening because of the impending Sabbath. Now they could do things properly. It would be hard to see him again, to look at that expressionless face they had known so well, to anoint the cold stiff flesh of the one who had meant everything to them. Once the anointing was done what would they do? What would be the future of this group Jesus had gathered around him? They had even heard that some members of the group were leaving today, to return to their homes because now that Jesus was dead, everything was over. It was now meaningless to be his follower. It was hard to believe that it was really all over, but that seemed to be the truth they had to face. The darkness of discouragement does not belong to a Christian. 2. An Unexpected Light Dawns: In the middle of their doubt, in the middle of their sorrow, in the middle of their hopelessness, a ray of light enters that grows to blinding proportions. The stone is gone, rolled back. They hurry into the tomb, fearing the worst, but the tomb is filled with light instead of darkness. How? A man...? No, an angel! He is smiling at them. He gives a message of unbelievable good news. Jesus is risen! He will see you in Galilee! “This is really unbelievable,” they think to themselves. “People don’t rise from the dead.” But somehow the angel’s impossible words bring them comfort, peace and even belief. In their hearts they know that the impossible has really come true. We need to nourish hope. We need to center our hearts on what is good and true and beautiful, namely Jesus Christ and his plan of salvation. Herein lie my strength and joy. 3. A New Perspective on Everything: The angel has given them a mission. They are to announce the Resurrection to the others. They have a message and they know it is of the greatest importance. Jesus, their hope, is alive. As they head toward the Upper Room, their minds start to work on the startling news they have received and they begin to understand many other things about Jesus. They remember how he spoke about having to suffer and die, but that he would rise. How strange they didn’t listen before. It seems so obvious now. The truth of the Resurrection makes everything new. Does the wonder of the Resurrection penetrate my entire life filling me with peace and joy? If not, why not? Am I convinced that the best way I can witness to Christ is by a life that is “full” and truly happy, whatever the vicissitudes I may suffer? Conversation with Christ: Lord Jesus, if I really believed that this life was a preparation for the next, I would put a lot more effort into pleasing you more every day. Help me to believe that a Christian only rents his tomb and that his treasures are not stored up in this life, but the next. Resolution: Today, as I prepare for the celebration of the Resurrection, I will take stock of my life. I will ask myself, “Does the Resurrection really make a difference to me?” Do I really live differently from those who don’t accept Christ because I believe in the Resurrection? Or is my belief merely a veneer that allows me to think of myself as a Christian when really nothing in the way I live distinguishes me from those who are not Christians? Having made this evaluation, I will correct something that needs changing so as to show I believe in the Resurrection with all my heart.
Excerpts
from the DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
205 +The Resurrection. Today,
during the [Mass of the] Resurrection, I saw the Lord Jesus in the midst of a
great light. He approached me and said, Peace be to you, My children, and
He lifted up His hand and gave His blessing. The wounds in His hands, feet
and side were indelible and shining. When He looked at me with such kindness
and love, my whole soul drowned itself in Him. And He said to me, You have
taken a great part in My Passion; therefore I now give you a great share in
My joy and glory. The whole time of the Resurrection [Mass] seemed like
only a minute to me. A wondrous recollection filled my soul and lasted
throughout the whole festal season. The kindness of Jesus is so great that I
cannot express it.
306 I
asked the Lord to grant me the grace that my nature be immune and resist the
influences that sometimes try to draw me away from the spirit of our rule and
from the minor regulations. These minor transgressions are like little moths
that try to destroy the spiritual life within us, and they surely will
destroy it if the soul is aware of these minor transgressions and yet
disregards them as small things. I can see nothing that is small in the
religious life. Little matter if I am sometimes the object of vexation and
jeers, as long as my spirit remains in harmony with the spirit of the rules,
the vows and the religious statutes.
O my Jesus, delight of my heart, You know my desires. I should like to hide from people's sight so as to be like one alive and yet not living. I want to live pure as a wild flower; I want my love always to be turned to You, just as a flower that is always turning to the sun. I want the fragrance and the freshness of the flower of my heart to be always preserved for You alone. I want to live beneath Your divine gaze, for You alone are enough for me. When I am with You, Jesus, I fear nothing, for nothing can do me harm.
413 This morning I heard these words: From today until
the [celebration of the]
Resurrection, you will not feel My presence, but your soul
will be filled with great longing. And immediately a great longing filled my soul; I felt a
separation from my beloved Jesus, and when the moment for Holy
Communion came, I saw the suffering Face of Jesus in every Host
[contained] in the chalice. From that moment, I felt a more intense yearning
in my heart.
649 Mass of the Resurrection. [April 12, 1936]. When I
entered the chapel, my spirit was immersed in God, its only treasure. His
presence flooded me.
650 O my Jesus, my Master and Director, strengthen and
enlighten me in these difficult moments of my life. I expect no help from
people; all my hope is in You. I feel alone in the face of Your demands, O
Lord. Despite the fears and qualms of my nature, I am fulfilling Your holy
will and desire to fulfill it as faithfully as possible throughout my life
and in my death. Jesus, with You I can do all things. Do with me as You
please; only give me Your merciful Heart and that is enough for me.
O Jesus my Lord, help me. Let what You have planned before
all ages happen to me. I am ready at each beckoning of Your holy will.
Enlighten my mind that I may know Your will. O God, You who pervade my soul,
You know that I desire nothing but Your glory.
O Divine Will, You are the delight of my heart, the food
of my soul, the light of my intellect, the omnipotent strength of my will;
for when I unite myself with Your will, O Lord, Your power works through me
and takes the place of my feeble will. Each day, I seek to carry out God's
wishes.
697 Jesus, You know that I love suffering and want to
drain the cup of suffering to the last drop; and yet, my nature experienced a
slight shudder and fear. Quickly, however, my trust in the infinite mercy of
God was awakened in all its force, and everything else had to give way before
it, like a shadow retreating before the sun's rays. O Jesus, how great is
Your goodness! Your infinite goodness, so well known to me, enables me to
bravely look death itself in the eye. I know that nothing will happen to me
without God's permission. I desire to glorify Your infinite mercy during my
life, at the hour of death, in the resurrection and
throughout eternity.
+ My Jesus, my strength, my peace, my repose; my soul
bathes daily in the rays of Your mercy. There is not a moment in my life when
I do not experience Your mercy, O God. I count on nothing in my whole life,
but only on Your infinite mercy. It is the guiding thread of my life, O Lord.
My soul is filled with God's mercy.
699 On one occasion, I heard these words: My
daughter, tell the whole world about My inconceivable mercy. I desire that
the Feast of Mercy [139] be a refuge and shelter for all souls, and especially for poor
sinners. On that day the very depths of My tender mercy are open. I pour out
a whole ocean of graces upon those souls who approach the fount of My mercy.
The soul that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion shall obtain
complete forgiveness of sins and punishment. On that day all the divine
floodgates through which grace flow are opened. Let no soul fear to draw near
to Me, even though its sins be as scarlet. My mercy is so great that no mind,
be it of man or of angel, will be able to fathom it throughout all eternity.
Everything that exists has come forth from the very depths of My most tender
mercy. Every soul in its relation to Me will contemplate My love and mercy
throughout eternity. The Feast of Mercy emerged from My very depths of
tenderness. It is My desire that it be solemnly celebrated on the first Sunday
after Easter. Mankind will not have peace until it turns to the Fount of My
Mercy.
1067 March 28. Resurrection. During the Mass of
Resurrection, I saw the Lord in beauty and splendor, and He said to me, My
daughter, peace be with you. He blessed me and disappeared, and my soul
was filled with gladness and joy beyond words. My heart was fortified for
struggle and sufferings.
1141 In the evening, He gave me to understand how fleeting
all earthly things are, and [how] everything that appears great disappears
like smoke, and does not give the soul freedom, but weariness. Happy the soul
that understands these things and with only one foot touches the earth. My
repose is to be united with You; everything else tires me. Oh, how much I
feel I am in exile! I see that no one understands my interior life. You alone
understand me, You who are hidden in my heart and yet are eternally alive.
1427 Hidden Jesus, life of my soul,
Object of my ardent desire,
Nothing will stifle Your love in my heart.
The power of our mutual love assures me of that.
Hidden Jesus, glorious pledge of my resurrection,
All my life is concentrated in You.
It is You, O Host, who empower me to love forever,
And I know that You will love me as Your child in return.
Hidden Jesus, my purest love,
My life with You has begun already here on earth,
And it will become fully manifest in the eternity to come,
Because our mutual love will never change.
Hidden Jesus, sole desire of my soul,
You alone are to me more than the delights of heaven.
My soul searches for You only, who are above all gifts and
graces,
You who come to me under the form of bread.
Hidden Jesus, take at last to Yourself my thirsting heart
Which burns for You with the pure fire of the Seraphim.
I go through life in Your footsteps, invincible,
With head held high, like a knight, feeble maid though I
be.
1668 The Resurrection. Before the Mass of the
Resurrection, I felt so weak that I lost all hope of participating in the
procession which takes place in the church; and I said to the Lord,
"Jesus, if my prayers are pleasing to You, give me the strength for this
moment that I may take part in the procession." At that same instant, I
felt strong and certain that I could go along with the sisters in the
procession.
1702 Towards the end of the Way of
the Cross which I was making, the Lord Jesus began to complain about the
souls of religious and priests, about the lack of love in chosen souls. I
will allow convents and churches to be destroyed. I answered,
"Jesus, but there are so many souls praising You in convents." The
Lord answered, That praise wounds My Heart, because love has been banished
from convents. Souls without love and without devotion, souls full of egoism
and self-love, souls full of pride and arrogance, souls full of deceit and
hypocrisy, lukewarm souls who have just enough warmth to keep them alive: My
Heart cannot bear this. All the graces that I pour out upon them flow off
them as off the face of a rock. I cannot stand them, because they are neither
good or bad. I called convents into being to sanctify the world through them.
It is from them that a powerful flame of love and sacrifice should burst
forth. And if they do not repent and become enkindled by their first love, I
will deliver them over to the fate of this world...
How can they sit on the promised throne of judgment to judge the world, when their guilt is greater than the guilt of the world? There is neither penance nor atonement. O heart, which received Me in the morning and at noon are all ablaze with hatred against Me, hatred of all sorts! O heart specially chosen by Me, were you chosen for this, to give Me more pain? The great sins of the world are superficial wounds on My Heart, but the sins of a chosen soul pierce My Heart through and through...
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska
Notebook-I-205, 306, 413)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska
Notebook-II-649-650, 697, 699)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska
Notebook-III-1067, 1141)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska
Notebook-V-1427)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-VI-1668, 1702) |
I promise that the soul that will venerate this image will not perish. I also promise victory over [its] enemies already here on earth, especially at the hour of death. I Myself will defend it as My own glory. (Notebook I-48)
I desire that you know more profoundly the love that burns in My Heart for souls, and you will understand this when you meditate upon My Passion. Call upon My mercy on behalf of sinners; I desire their salvation. When you say this prayer, with a contrite heart and with faith on behalf of some sinner, I will give him the grace of conversion. This is the prayer: "O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fount of Mercy for us, I trust in You."
(Notebook I-186-187)
I desire that you know more profoundly the love that burns in My Heart for souls, and you will understand this when you meditate upon My Passion. Call upon My mercy on behalf of sinners; I desire their salvation. When you say this prayer, with a contrite heart and with faith on behalf of some sinner, I will give him the grace of conversion. This is the prayer: "O Blood and Water, which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a fount of Mercy for us, I trust in You."
(Notebook I-186-187)
Marso 31, 2018
A Christian Only Rents a Tomb-Divine Mercy Miracles Meditations
Marso 30, 2018
Invitation to Intimacy-Divine Mercy Miracles Meditations
Invitation to Intimacy
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March 30, 2018. Good Friday of the Lord’s Passion
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Father David Daly, LC
John 18:1-19
When he had said
this, Jesus went out with his disciples across the Kidron valley to where
there was a garden, into which he and his disciples entered. Judas his
betrayer also knew the place, because Jesus had often met there with his
disciples. So Judas got a band of soldiers and guards from the chief priests
and the Pharisees and went there with lanterns, torches, and weapons. Jesus,
knowing everything that was going to happen to him, went out and said to
them, "Whom are you looking for?" They answered him, "Jesus
the Nazorean." He said to them, "I AM." Judas his betrayer was
also with them. When he said to them, "I AM," they turned away and fell
to the ground. So he again asked them, "Whom are you looking for?"
They said, "Jesus the Nazorean." Jesus answered, "I told you
that I AM. So if you are looking for me, let these men go.” This was to
fulfill what he had said, "I have not lost any of those you gave
me." Then Simon Peter, who had a sword, drew it, struck the high
priest´s slave, and cut off his right ear. The slave´s name was Malchus.
Jesus said to Peter, "Put your sword into its scabbard. Shall I not
drink the cup that the Father gave me?" So the band of soldiers, the
tribune, and the Jewish guards seized Jesus, bound him, and brought him to
Annas first. He was the father-in-law of Caiaphas, who was high priest that
year. It was Caiaphas who had counseled the Jews that it was better that one
man should die rather than the people. Simon Peter and another disciple
followed Jesus. Now the other disciple was known to the high priest, and he
entered the courtyard of the high priest with Jesus. But Peter stood at the
gate outside. So the other disciple, the acquaintance of the high priest,
went out and spoke to the gatekeeper and brought Peter in. Then the maid who
was the gatekeeper said to Peter, "You are not one of this man´s
disciples, are you?" He said, "I am not." Now the slaves and
the guards were standing around a charcoal fire that they had made, because
it was cold, and were warming themselves. Peter was also standing there
keeping warm. The high priest questioned Jesus about his disciples and about
his doctrine. Jesus answered, "I have spoken openly to the world; I have
always taught in synagogues and in the Temple, where all the Jews come
together. I have said nothing in secret. Why do you ask me? Ask those who
heard what I said to them; they know what I said." When he had said this,
one of the police standing nearby struck Jesus on the face, saying, "Is
that how you answer the high priest?" Jesus answered, "If I have
spoken wrongly, testify to the wrong. But if I have spoken rightly, why do
you strike me?" Then Annas sent him bound to Caiaphas the high priest.
Now Simon Peter was standing and warming himself. They asked him, "You
are not also one of his disciples, are you?" He denied it and said,
"I am not." One of the slaves of the high priest, a relative of the
man whose ear Peter had cut off, asked, "Did I not see you in the garden
with him?" Again Peter denied it, and at that moment the cock crowed.
Introductory Prayer:
Lord Jesus, Good
Friday is the day when You conquered sin by Your death on the cross. You
showed your mercy to be indestructible. The more the offenses thrown against
You, the greater the forgiveness that came from Your Sacred Heart. Thank You,
Lord, for Your humble, generous gift of Yourself amidst such terrible
suffering. I wish to accompany You closely today in Your Passion. I wish to
know You and to follow You more closely all the days of my life.
Petition: Lord, convince my
heart that You truly died out of personal love for me.
1. The Affirmation:
“I AM”. These are
the courageous words of Christ before the cohort of soldiers sent to
apprehend him in the garden of Gethsemane. They are the same words that God
used to describe himself to Moses on Mt. Sinai. They are the words that have
been used in Christian thought to refer to the Creator of all existing
things. They are words in which Christ recognizes and proclaims his divinity
before the soldiers. For this reason, they turned around and fell to the
ground. As we meditate on Christ’s Passion, let us remember his divinity. He
is my God and he is my Savior.
2. The Denial:
“I am not.” These
words of Peter stand in stark contrast to the words proclaiming Christ’s
divinity. We could say that they represent all that is weak and fragile in
man, expressed through the mouth of St. Peter. Unlike Christ in the garden,
Peter stands by a warm fire and responds to a young servant girl. He denies
being a follower of Christ and, in doing so, confirms his own weakness and
his need for God’s grace and mercy. We should identify with Peter and
recognize our need for Christ’s sacrifice. When “I Am Not”? When do I let my
human fragility get the better of me and pull me down? What do I need to do
to avoid the pitfalls in my life and be a more faithful follower of Christ?
3. Out of Love for
Me: This Gospel scene
juxtaposes Peter’s denial and Christ’s sentence to death. Even though
Christ’s death would have happened without Peter’s denial, what was its
effect on Our Lord? Jesus was dying for Peter and all people in order to save
us from our sins. Peter’s lack of faith and love did not change that. But
when he turned again and believed, he recognized that Jesus had done it all
for him, and from then on he proclaimed it far and wide. May the Lord help us
to realize that Christ sees all of our actions and they either console him or
add to the pain of so many infidelities. We need to work steadily to build a
second nature within ourselves so that in moments of temptation our heart
turns first to Jesus, considers the offense we might cause him and then our
will kicks in to reject doing wrong and thus please Our Lord and Savior.
Conversation with
Christ: Lord Jesus, as I
contemplate Your loving self-giving on Good Friday, I ask you to fill my
heart with a deeper knowledge and love of You. All of my infidelities and
weaknesses contribute to what You have suffered. You did it out of love for
me and for each one of my brothers and sisters. Thank you.
Resolution: I resolve to ask for
the personal experience of Christ’s love today, especially when considering
his passion and death.
Excerpts from the DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
26 End of the
novitiate. The suffering does not diminish. Physical weakness dispenses me
from all [community] spiritual exercises; that is to say, they are replaced
by brief
ejaculatory prayers. Good Friday [April 16, 1928] -Jesus
catches up my heart into the very flame of His love. This was during the
evening adoration. All of a sudden, the Divine Presence invaded me, and I
forgot everything else. Jesus gave me to understand how much He had suffered
for me. This lasted a very short time. An intense yearning-a longing to love
God.
Darkness and Temptations
77 My mind became dimmed in a strange way; no truth seemed clear to me. When people spoke to me about God, my heart was like a rock. I could not draw from it a single sentiment of love for Him. When I tried, by an act of the will, to remain close to Him, I experienced great torments, and it seemed to me that I was only provoking God to an even greater anger. It was absolutely impossible for me to meditate as I had been accustomed to do in the past. I felt in my soul a great void, and there was nothing with which I could fill it. I began to suffer from a great hunger and yearning for God, but I saw my utter powerlessness. I tried to read slowly, sentence by sentence, and to meditate in this way, but this also was of no avail. I understood nothing of what I had read. The abyss of my misery was constantly before my eyes. Every time I entered the chapel for some spiritual exercise, I experienced even worse torments and temptations. More than once, all through Holy Mass, I had to struggle against blasphemous thoughts which were forcing themselves to my lips. I felt an aversion for the Holy Sacraments, and it seemed to me that I was not profiting from them in any way. It was only out of obedience to my confessor that I frequented them, and this blind obedience was for me the only path I could follow and my very last hope of survival. The priest explained to me that these were trials sent by God and that, in the situation I was in, not only was I not offending God, but I was most pleasing to Him. "This is a sign," he told me, "that God loves you very much and that He has great confidence in you, since He is sending you such trials." But these words brought me no comfort; it seemed to me that they did not apply to me at all. One thing did surprise me: it often happened that, at the time when I was suffering greatly, these terrible torments would disappear suddenly just as I was approaching the confessional; but as soon as I had left the confessional, all these torments would again seize me with even greater ferocity. I would then fall on my face before the Blessed Sacrament repeating these words: "Even if You kill me, still will I trust in You!" [cf. Job 13:15] It seemed to me that I would die in these agonies. But the most terrible thought for me was the conviction that I had been rejected by God. Then other thoughts came to me: why strive to acquire virtues and do good works? why mortify and annihilate yourself? what good is it to take vows? to pray? to sacrifice and immolate yourself? why sacrifice myself all the time? what good is it - if I am already rejected by God? why all these efforts? And here, God alone knew what was going on in my heart.
96 +Trials sent by God to a soul which
is particularly loved by Him.
Temptations and darkness; Satan. The soul's love [for God] is still not such as God would have it. The soul suddenly loses the tangible perception of God's presence. Various defects and imperfections rise up within it, and it must fight them furiously. All her faults lift up their heads, but the soul's vigilance is great. The former awareness of the presence of God gives place to coldness and spiritual dryness; the soul has no taste for spiritual exercises; it cannot pray, either in the old way, or in the manner in which it had just begun to pray. It struggles this way and that, but can find no satisfaction. God has hidden himself from it, and it can find no consolation in creatures, nor can any of these creatures find a way of consoling it. The soul craves passionately for God, but sees its own misery; it begins to sense God's justice; it seems to it that it has lost all the gifts that God had given it; its mind is dimmed, and darkness fills it; unspeakable torment begins. The soul tries to explain its state to the confessor, but it is not understood and is assailed by an even greater unrest. Satan begins his work.
97 Faith staggers under the impact; the struggle is fierce. The soul
tries hard to cling to God by an act of will. With God's permission, Satan
goes even further: hope and love are put to the test. These temptations are
terrible. God supports the soul in secret, so to speak. The soul is not aware
of this, but otherwise it would be impossible to stand firm; and God knows
very well how much He can allow to befall a soul. The soul is tempted to
unbelief in respect to revealed truths and to insincerity toward the
confessor. Satan says to it, "Look, no one understands you; why speak
about all this?" Words that terrify it sound in its ears, and it seems
to the soul that it is uttering these against God. It sees what it does not
want to see. It hears what it does not want to hear. And, oh, it is a
terrible thing at times like these not to have an experienced confessor! The
soul carries the whole burden alone. However, one should make every effort to
find, if it is at all possible, a well-informed confessor, for the soul can
collapse under the burden and come to the very edge of the precipice. All
these trials are heavy and difficult. God does not send them to a soul which
has not already been admitted to a deeper intimacy with Him and which has not
yet tasted the divine delights. Besides, in this God has His own plans, which
for us are impenetrable. God often prepares a soul in this way for His future
designs and great works. He wants to try it as pure gold is tried. But this
is not yet the end of the testing; there is still the trial of trials, the
complete abandonment of the soul by God.
+ The Trial of Trials, Complete Abandonment - Despair
98 When the soul comes out victorious from the preceding trials, even though it may stumble here and there, it fights on valiantly, humbly calling upon God, "Save me, I am perishing!" And it is still able to fight on. At this point, however, the soul is engulfed in a horrible night. It sees within itself only sin. It feels terrible. It sees itself completely abandoned by God. It feels itself to be the object of His hatred. It is but one step away from despair. The soul does its best to defend itself; it tries to stir up its confidence; but prayer is an even greater torment for it, as this prayer seems to arouse God to an even greater anger. The soul finds itself poised on the summit of a lofty mountain on the very brink of a precipice. The soul is drawn to God, but feels repulsed. All other sufferings and tortures in the world are as nothing compared with this sensation into which it has been plunged; namely, that of being rejected by God. No one can bring it any relief; it finds itself completely alone; there is no one to defend it. It raises its eyes to heaven, but is convinced that this is not for her-for her all is lost. It falls deeper and deeper from darkness to darkness, and it seems to it that it has lost forever the God it used to love so dearly. This thought is torture beyond all description. But the soul does not agree to it and tries to lift its gaze toward heaven, but in vain! And this makes the torture even more intense. If God wishes to keep the soul in such darkness, no one will be able to give it light. It experiences rejection by God in a vivid and terrifying manner. From its heart burst forth painful moans, so painful that no priest will comprehend it, unless he himself has been through these trials. In the midst of this, the evil spirit adds to the soul's suffering, mocking it: "Will you persist in your faithfulness? This is your reward; you are in our power!" But Satan has only as much influence over the soul as God allows him, and God knows how much we can bear. "What have you gotten out of your mortifications," says Satan, "and out of your fidelity to the rule? What use are all these efforts? You have been rejected by God!" This word, rejected, becomes a fire which penetrates every nerve to the marrow of the bone. It pierces right through her entire being. The ordeal reaches its climax. The soul no longer looks for help anywhere. It shrinks into itself and loses sight of everything; it is as though it has accepted the torture of being abandoned. This is a moment for which I have no words. This is the agony of the soul.
101 Jesus, You alone know how the
soul, engulfed in darkness, moans in the midst of these torments and, despite
all this, thirsts for God as burning lips thirst for water. It dies and
withers; it dies a death without death; that is to say, it cannot die. All
its efforts come to nothing; it is under a powerful hand. Now the soul comes
under the power of the Just One. All exterior temptations cease; all that
surrounds it becomes silent, like a dying person who loses contact with
everything around it: the person's entire soul is in the hand of the Just
God, the Thrice-Holy God,-rejected for all eternity! This is the culminating
moment, and God alone can test a soul in this way, because He alone knows what
the soul can endure.
When the soul has been saturated through and through by this infernal fire, it is, as it were, cast headlong into great despair. My soul experienced this moment when I was all alone in my cell. When my soul began to sink into this despair, I felt that the end was near. But I seized my little crucifix and clutched it tightly in my hand. And now I felt my body separate itself from my soul; and though I wanted to go to my Superiors, I no longer had the physical strength. I uttered my last words: "I trust in Your Mercy!"-and it seemed to me that I provoked God to an even greater anger. And now I was drowned in despair, and all that was left me was a moan of unadulterated pain which, from time to time, tore itself from my soul. The soul is in agony-and it seemed to me that I would remain in this state, because by my own strength I could not emerge from it. Every recollection of God opened up an unspeakable ocean of suffering, and yet despite this there is something within the soul which is drawn to Him, though it seems to her for this only-that she suffer more. The memory of the love with which God formerly surrounded it is still another kind of suffering. His gaze pierces it, and everything within the soul is burned by this gaze.
116 My Jesus, You know what my
soul goes through at the recollection of these sufferings. I have often
marvelled that the angels and saints hold their peace at the sight of a soul
suffering like that. Yet they have special love for us at such moments. My
soul has often cried out after God, as a little child who cries as loudly as
he can when his mother covers her face and he cannot recognize her. O my
Jesus, honor and glory to You for these trials of love! Great and
incomprehensible is your mercy. All that You intended for my soul, O Lord, is
steeped in Your mercy.
118 The tongue is a small member,
but it does big things. A religious who does not keep silence will never
attain holiness; that is, she will never become a saint. Let her not delude
herself-unless it is the Spirit of God who is speaking through her, for then
she must not keep silent. But, in order to hear the voice of God, one has to
have silence in one's soul and to keep silence; not a gloomy silence, but an
interior silence; that is to say, recollection in God. One can speak a great
deal without breaking silence and, on the contrary, one can speak little and
be constantly breaking silence. Oh, what irreparable damage is done by the
breach of silence! We cause a lot of harm to our neighbor, but even more to
our own selves.
In my opinion, and according to my
experience, the rule concerning silence should stand in the very first place.
God does not give himself to a chattering soul which, like a drone in a
beehive, buzzes around but gathers no honey. A talkative soul is empty
inside. It lacks both the essential virtues and intimacy with God. A deeper
interior life, one of gentle peace and of that silence where the Lord dwells,
is quite out of the question. A soul that has never tasted the sweetness of
inner silence is a restless spirit which disturbs the silence of others. I
have seen many souls in the depths of hell for not having kept their silence;
they told me so themselves when I asked them what was the cause of their
undoing. These were souls of religious. My God, what an agony it is to think
that not only might they have been in heaven, but they might even have become
saints! O Jesus, have mercy!
147 I recall that I have received most light during adoration which I
made lying prostrate before the Blessed Sacrament for half an hour every day
throughout Lent. During that time I came to know myself and God more
profoundly. And yet, even though I had the superiors' permission to do so, I
encountered many obstacles to praying in such a way. Let the soul be aware
that, in order to pray and persevere in prayer, one must arm oneself with
patience and cope bravely with exterior and interior difficulties. The
interior difficulties are discouragement, dryness, heaviness of spirit and
temptations. The exterior difficulties are human respect and time; one must
observe the time set apart for prayer. This has been my personal experience
because, when I did not pray at the time assigned for prayer, later on I
could not do it because of my duties; or if I did manage to do so, this was
only with great difficulty, because my thoughts kept wandering off to my
duties. I also experienced this difficulty: when a soul has prayed well and
left prayer in a state of profound interior recollection, others resist its
recollection; and so, the soul must be patient to persevere in prayer. It
often happened to me that when my soul was more deeply immersed in God, and I
had derived greater fruit from prayer, and God's presence accompanied me
during the day, and at work there was more recollection and greater precision
and effort at my duty, this was precisely when I received the most rebukes
for being negligent in my duty and indifferent to everything; because less
recollected souls want others to be like them, for they are a constant [source
of] remorse to them.
163 JMJ The Year 1937
General Exercises
+O Most Holy Trinity! As many
times as I breathe, as many times as my heart beats, as many times as my
blood pulsates through my body, so many thousand times do I want to glorify
Your mercy.
+I want to be completely
transformed into Your mercy and to be Your living reflection, O Lord. May the
greatest of all divine attributes, that of Your unfathomable mercy, pass
through my heart and soul to my neighbor.
Help me, O Lord, that my eyes may be
merciful, so that I may never suspect or judge from appearances, but look for
what is beautiful in my neighbors' souls and come to their rescue.
Help me, that my ears may be
merciful, so that I may give heed to my neighbors' needs and not be
indifferent to their pains and moaning. Help me, O Lord, that my tongue may
be merciful, so that I should never speak negatively of my neighbor, but have
a word of comfort and forgiveness for all.
Help me, O Lord, that my hands may
be merciful and filled with good deeds, so that I may do only good to my
neighbors and take upon myself the more difficult and toilsome tasks.
Help me, that my feet may be
merciful, so that I may hurry to assist my neighbor, overcoming my own
fatigue and weariness. My true rest is in the service of my neighbor.
Help me, O Lord, that my heart may
be merciful so that I myself may feel all the sufferings of my neighbor. I
will refuse my heart to no one. I will be sincere even with those who, I
know, will abuse my kindness. And I will lock myself up in the most merciful
Heart of Jesus. I will bear my own suffering in silence. May Your mercy, O
Lord, rest upon me.
+You yourself command me to
exercise the three degrees of mercy. The first: the act of mercy, of whatever
kind. The second: the word of mercy-if I cannot carry out a work of mercy, I
will assist by my words. The third: prayer-if I cannot show mercy by deeds or
words, I can always do so by prayer. My prayer reaches out even there where I
cannot reach out physically.
O my Jesus, transform me into
Yourself, for you can do all things.
173 Satan's temptations during meditation. I felt a
strange fear that the priest would not
understand me, or that he would have no time to hear
everything I would have to say. How am I going to tell him all this? If it
were Father Bukowski I could do it more easily, but this Jesuit whom I am
seeing for the first time... Then I remembered Father Bukowski's advice that
I should at least take brief notes of the lights sent to me by God during the
retreats and give him at least a brief report on them. My God, for a day and
a half all has gone well, and now a life and death struggle is beginning. The
conference is to start in a half hour, and then I am to go to confession.
Satan tried to persuade me into believing that if my superiors have told me
that my inner life is an illusion, why should I ask again and trouble the
confessor? Didn't MX [probably Mother Jane] tell you that the Lord Jesus does
not commune with souls as miserable as yours? This confessor is going to tell
you the same thing. Why speak to him about all this? These are not sins, and
Mother X, told you that all this communing with the Lord Jesus was
daydreaming and pure hysteria. So why tell it to this confessor? You would do
better to dismiss all this as illusions. Look how many humiliations you have
suffered because of them, and how many more are still awaiting you, and all
the sisters know that you are a hysteric. "Jesus!" I called out
with all the strength of my soul.
216 We have come to Cracow today
[April 18, 1933]. What a joy it is to find myself again where I took my first
steps in the spiritual life! Dear Mother Directress [Mary Joseph] is ever the
same, cheerful and full of love of neighbor. I entered the chapel for a
moment and joy filled my soul. In a flash I recalled the whole ocean of
graces that had been given me as a novice here.
241 Love of neighbor. First:
Helpfulness towards the sisters. Second: Do not speak about those who are
absent, and defend the good name of my neighbor. Third: Rejoice in the
success of others.
267 Jesus told me that I please
Him best by meditating on His sorrowful Passion, and by such meditation much
light falls upon my soul. He who wants to learn true humility should reflect
upon the Passion of Jesus. When I meditate upon the Passion of Jesus, I get a
clear understanding of many things I could not comprehend before. I want to
resemble You, O Jesus,-You crucified, tortured and humiliated. Jesus, imprint
upon my heart and soul Your own humility. I love You, Jesus, to the point of
madness, You who were crushed with suffering as described by the prophet [cf.
Isaiah 53:2-9], as if he could not see the human form in You because of Your
great suffering. It is in this condition, Jesus, that I love You to the point
of madness. O eternal and infinite God, what has love done to You?...
275 Jesus loves hidden souls. A
hidden flower is the most fragrant. I must strive to make the interior of my
soul a resting place for the Heart of Jesus. In difficult and painful
moments, O my Creator, I sing You a hymn of trust, for bottomless is the
abyss of my trust in You and in Your mercy!
278 At the feet of the Lord.
Hidden Jesus, Eternal Love, our Source of Life, Divine Madman, in that You
forget yourself and see only us. Before creating heaven and earth, You
carried us in the depths of Your Heart. O Love, O depth of Your abasement, O
mystery of happiness, why do so few people know You? Why is Your love not
returned? O Divine Love, why do You hide Your beauty? O Infinite One beyond all
understanding, the more I know You the less I comprehend You; but because I
cannot comprehend You, I better comprehend Your greatness. I do not envy the
Seraphim their fire, for I have a greater gift deposited in my heart. They
admire You in rapture, but Your Blood mingles with mine. Love is heaven given
us already here on earth. Oh, why do You hide in faith? Love tears away the
veil. There is no veil before the eye of my soul, for You yourself have drawn
me into the bosom of secret love forever. Praise and glory be to You, O
Indivisible Trinity, One God, unto ages of ages!
279 God made known to me what true
love consists in and gave light to me about how, in practice, to give proof
of it to Him. True love of God consists in carrying out God's will. To show
God our love in what we do, all our actions, even the least, must spring from
our love of God. And the Lord said to me, My child, you please Me most by
suffering. In your physical as well as your mental sufferings, My daughter,
do not seek sympathy from creatures. I want the fragrance of your suffering
to be pure and unadulterated. I want you to detach yourself, not only from
creatures, but also from yourself. My daughter, I want to delight in the love
of your heart, a pure love, virginal, unblemished, untarnished. The more you
will come to love suffering, My daughter, the purer your love for Me will be.
281 I feel certain that my mission will not come to an end upon my
death, but will begin. O doubting souls, I will draw aside for you the veils
of heaven to convince you of God's goodness, so that you will no longer
continue to wound with your distrust the sweetest Heart of Jesus. God is Love
and Mercy.
282 Once the Lord said to me, My
Heart was moved by great mercy towards you, My dearest child, when I saw you
torn to shreds because of the great pain you suffered in repenting for your
sins. I see your love, so pure and true that I give you first place among the
virgins. You are the honor and glory of My Passion. I see every abasement of
your soul, and nothing escapes my attention. I lift up the humble even to my
very throne, because I want it so.
283 I want to love You as no human
soul has ever loved You before; and although I am utterly miserable and
small, I have nevertheless cast the anchor of my trust deep down into the
abyss of Your mercy, O my God and Creator! In spite of my great misery I fear
nothing, but hope to sing You a hymn of glory forever. Let no soul, even the
most miserable, fall prey to doubt; for, as long as one is alive, each one can
become a great saint, so great is the power of God's grace. It remains only
for us not to oppose God's action.
287 +My Jesus, when I look at this
life of souls, I see that many of them serve You with some mistrust. At
certain times, especially when there is an opportunity to show their love for
God, I see them running away from the battlefield. And once Jesus said to me,
Do you, my child, also want to act like that? I answered the Lord,
"Oh, no, my Jesus, I will not retreat from the battlefield, even if mortal
sweat breaks out on my brow; I will not let the sword fall from my hand until
I rest at the feet of the Holy Trinity!" Whatever I do, I do not rely on
my own strength, but on God's grace. With God's grace a soul can overcome the
greatest difficulties.
294 +Once the Lord said to me, Act
like a beggar who does not back away when he gets more alms [than he asked
for], but offers thanks the more fervently. You too should not back away and
say that you are not worthy of receiving greater graces when I give them to
you. I know you are unworthy, but rejoice all the more and take as many
treasures from My Heart as you can carry, for then you will please Me more.
And I will tell you one more thing: Take these graces not only for yourself,
but also for others; that is, encourage the souls with whom you come in
contact to trust in My infinite mercy. Oh, how I love those souls who have
complete confidence in Me. I will do everything for them.
296 +O Supreme Good, I want to
love You as no one on earth has ever loved You before! I want to adore You
with every moment of my life and unite my will closely to Your holy will. My
life is not drab or monotonous, but it is varied like a garden of fragrant
flowers, so that I don't know which flower to pick first, the lily of
suffering or the rose of love of neighbor or the violet of humility. I will
not enumerate these treasures in which my every day abounds. It is a great
thing to know how to make use of the present moment.
343 True love is measured by the thermometer of suffering.
Jesus, I thank You for the little daily crosses, for opposition to my
endeavors, for the hardships of communal life, for the misinterpretation of
my intentions, for humiliations at the hands of others, for the harsh way in
which we are treated, for false suspicions, for poor health and loss of
strength, for self-denial, for dying to myself, for lack of recognition in
everything, for the upsetting of all my plans.
Thank You, Jesus, for interior sufferings, for dryness of spirit, for terrors, fears and incertitudes, for the darkness and the deep interior night, for temptations and various ordeals, for torments too difficult to describe, especially for those which no one will understand, for the hour of death with its fierce struggle and all its bitterness. I thank You, Jesus, You who first drank the cup of bitterness before You gave it to me, in a much milder form. I put my lips to this cup of Your holy will. Let all be done according to Your good pleasure; let that which Your wisdom ordained before the ages be done to me. I want to drink the cup to its last drop, and not seek to know the reason why. In bitterness is my joy, in hopelessness is my trust. In You, O Lord, all is good, all is a gift of Your paternal Heart. I do not prefer consolations over bitterness or bitterness over consolations, but thank You, O Jesus, for everything! It is my delight to fix my gaze upon You, O incomprehensible God! My spirit abides in these mysterious dwelling places, and there I am at home. I know very well the dwelling place of my Spouse. I feel there is not a single drop of blood in me that does not burn with love for You. O Uncreated Beauty, whoever comes to know You once cannot love anything else. I can feel the bottomless abyss of my soul, and nothing will fill it but God himself. I feel that I am drowned in Him like a single grain of sand in a bottomless ocean.
375 Particular interior practice;
that is, the examination of conscience. Self-denial, denial of my own will.
I. The denial of my reason.
Subjecting it to the reason of those who represent God to me here on earth.
II. The denial of my will. Doing
the will of God, which is revealed in the will of those who represent God to
me and which is contained in the rule of our order.
III. The denial of my judgment.
Accepting immediately and without reflection, analysis or reasoning all
orders given by those who represent God to me.
IV. The denial of my tongue. I
will not give it the least bit of freedom; but in one case only I will give
it complete freedom; that is, in proclaiming the glory of God. Whenever I
receive Holy Communion, I will ask Jesus to fortify and cleanse my tongue
that I may not injure my neighbor with it. That is why I have the greatest
respect for the rule which speaks about silence.
383 At the beginning of the
retreat, I saw, on the ceiling of the chapel, Jesus nailed to the Cross. He
was looking at the sisters with great love, but not at all of them. There
were three sisters at whom Jesus looked severely, for what reasons I do not
know. I only know what a terrible thing it is to meet with such a look, which
is the look of a severe Judge. That look was not directed at me, and yet I
was paralyzed with terror. I still tremble as I write these words. I did not
dare to say so much as a single word to Jesus. My physical strength failed
me, and I thought I would not live to the end of the conference. The next
day, I saw the same thing again, just as I had seen it the first time, and
this time I dared to speak these words: "Jesus, how great is Your mercy!"
On the third day, that gaze of
great kindness upon all the sisters, except the three, was again repeated. I
gathered up my courage, which drew its force from love of neighbor, and I
said to the Lord, "You, who are Mercy Itself, as You yourself told me, I
beg You by the power of Your mercy, to look then with kindness at these three
sisters as well. And if this is not in accord with Your wisdom, I ask You for
an exchange: turn to them the kind look meant for my soul, and let Your
severe gaze at their souls be turned on me." Jesus then said to me these
words: My daughter, for the sake of your sincere and generous love, I grant
them many graces although they are not asking Me for them. But I am doing so
because of the promise I have made to you. And at that moment, He turned a
merciful look towards those three sisters as well. My heart leapt with joy to
see the goodness of God.
414 On Good Friday, at three o'clock in the afternoon,
when I entered the chapel, I heard these words: I desire that the image be
publicly honored. Then I saw the Lord Jesus dying on the Cross amidst
great suffering, and out of the Heart of Jesus came the same two rays as are
in the image.
549 Work. As poor persons, the
nuns themselves will do all the work in the convent. Each one should be glad
when she is given some work which is humbling or which goes against her
nature, as that will greatly help her interior formation. The superior will
often change the sisters' duties, and in this way help them to detach
themselves completely from the little details to which women have a great
attachment. Truly, I often find it amusing to see with my own eyes souls who
have forsaken really great things only to attach themselves to fiddle faddle;
that is, trifles. Each sister, including even the superior, shall work in the
kitchen for a month. Everyone should take a turn at every chore which is to
be done in the convent.
571 O my Jesus, Eternal Truth, I fear nothing, neither hardships
nor sufferings; I fear only one thing, and that is to offend You. My Jesus, I
would rather not exist than make You sad. Jesus, You know that my love knows
no one but You. My soul is absorbed in You.
590 When I receive Holy Communion,
I entreat and beg the Savior to heal my tongue, that I may never fail in love
of neighbor.
640 On the First Friday of the month, before Communion, I
saw a large ciborium filled with sacred hosts. A hand placed the ciborium in
front of me, and I took it in my hands. There were a thousand living hosts
inside. Then I heard a voice, These are hosts which have been received
by the souls for whom you have obtained the grace of true conversion during
this Lent. That was a week before Good Friday. I spent the day in great
interior recollection, emptying myself for the sake of souls.
648 Good Friday. At three o'clock,
I saw the Lord Jesus, crucified, who looked at me and said, I thirst.
Then I saw two rays issue from His side, just as they appear in the image. I
then felt in my soul the desire to save souls and to empty myself for the
sake of poor sinners. I offered myself, together with the dying Jesus, to the
Eternal Father, for the salvation of the whole world. With Jesus, through
Jesus and in Jesus is my communion with You, Eternal Father. On Good Friday,
Jesus suffered in His soul in a way which was different from [His suffering
on] Holy Thursday.
692 + O Jesus, I understand that
Your mercy is beyond all imagining, and therefore I ask You to make my heart
so big that there will be room in it for the needs of all the souls living on
the face of the earth. O Jesus, my love extends beyond the world, to the
souls suffering in purgatory, and I want to exercise mercy toward them by
means of indulgenced prayers. God's mercy is unfathomable and inexhaustible,
just as God himself is unfathomable. Even if I were to use the strongest
words there are to express this mercy of God, all this would be nothing in
comparison with what it is in reality. O Jesus, make my heart sensitive to
all the sufferings of my neighbor, whether of body or of soul. O my Jesus, I
know that You act toward us as we act toward our neighbor.
My Jesus, make my heart like unto
Your merciful Heart. Jesus, help me to go through life doing good to
everyone.
700 + Once, when I was very tired
and in much pain, I told Mother Superior [Irene] about it and received the
answer that I should get used to suffering. I listened to everything that
Mother told me, and then I went out. Our Mother Superior has great love of
neighbor and especially great love for the sick sisters, as everyone knows. And
yet, as regards me, it is extraordinary that the Lord Jesus has permitted
that she not understand me and that she test me much in this respect.
704 I spend every free moment at
the feet of the hidden God. He is my Master; I ask Him about everything; I speak
to Him about everything. Here I obtain strength and light; here I learn
everything; here I am given light on how to act toward my neighbor. From the
time I left the novitiate, I have enclosed myself in the tabernacle together
with Jesus, my Master. He himself drew me into the fire of living love on
which everything converges.
742 My daughter, if I demand
through you that people revere My mercy, you should be the first to
distinguish yourself by this confidence in My mercy. I demand from you deeds
of mercy, which are to arise out of love for Me. You are to show mercy to
your neighbors always and everywhere. You must not shrink from this or try to
excuse or absolve yourself from it.
I am giving you three ways of
exercising mercy toward your neighbor: the first-by deed, the second-by word,
the third-by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of
mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for Me. By this means a soul
glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy. Yes, the first Sunday after Easter
is the Feast of Mercy, but there must also be acts of mercy, and I demand the
worship of My mercy through the solemn celebration of the Feast and through
the veneration of the image which is painted. By means of this image I shall
grant many graces to souls. It is to be a reminder of the demands of My
mercy, because even the strongest faith is of no avail without works. O my
Jesus, You yourself must help me in everything, because You see how very
little I am, and so I depend solely on Your goodness, O God.
+ Particular Examen
Union with the merciful Christ.
With my heart I encompass the whole world, especially countries which are
uncivilized or where there is persecution. I am praying for mercy upon them.
791 Hide me, Jesus, in the depths
of Your mercy, and then let my neighbor judge me as he pleases.
796 The Lord told me to say this chaplet for nine days
before the Feast of Mercy. It is to begin on Good Friday. By this novena,
I will grant every possible grace to souls.
856 During the morning meditation,
I felt an aversion and a repugnance for all created things. Everything pales
before my eyes; my spirit is detached from all things. I desire only God
himself, and yet I must live. This is a martyrdom beyond description. God
imparts himself to the soul in a loving way and draws it into the infinite
depths of His divinity, but at the same time He leaves it here on earth for
the sole purpose that it might suffer and die of longing for Him. And this
strong love is so pure that God himself finds pleasure in it; and self-love
has no access to its deeds, for here everything is totally saturated with
bitterness, and thus is totally pure. Life is a continuous dying, painful and
terrible, and at the same time it is the depth of true life and of inconceivable
happiness and the strength of the soul; and because of this, [the soul] is
capable of great deeds for the sake of God.
861 Particular examen: remains the
same; namely, to unite myself with the Merciful Christ (that is; what would
Christ do in such and such a case?) and, in spirit, to embrace the whole
world, especially Russia and Spain.
General resolutions.
I. Strict observance of silence -
interior silence.
II. To see the image of God in
every sister; all love of neighbor must flow from this motive.
III. To do the will of God
faithfully at every moment of my life and to live by this.
IV. To give a faithful account of
everything to the spiritual director and not to undertake anything of
importance without a clear understanding with him. I shall try to clearly lay
bare to him the most secret depths of my soul, bearing in mind that I am
dealing with God himself, and that His representative is just a human being,
and so I must pray daily that he be given light.
V. During the evening examination
of conscience, I am to ask myself the question: What if He were to call me
today?
VI. Not to look for God far away,
but within my own being to abide with Him alone.
VII. In sufferings and torments,
to take refuge in the tabernacle and to be silent.
VIII. To join all sufferings,
prayers, works and mortifications to the merits of Jesus in order to obtain
mercy for the world.
IX. To use free moments, however
short, for prayers for the dying.
X. There must not be a day in my
life when I do not recommend to the Lord the works of our Congregation. Never
have regard for what others think of you [for human respect].
XI. Have no familiar relationships
with anyone. Gentle firmness toward the girls, boundless patience; punish
them severely but with such punishments as these: prayer and self-sacrifice.
The strength that is in the emptying of myself for their sake is for them a
[source of] constant remorse and the softening of their obdurate hearts.
XII. The presence of God is the
basis of all my thoughts, words and deeds.
XIII. To take advantage of all
spiritual help. To always put self-love in its proper place; namely, the
last. To perform my spiritual exercises as though I were doing them for the
last time in my life, and in like manner to carry out all my duties.
871 + My Master, cause my heart
never to expect help from anyone, but I will always strive to bring
assistance, consolation and all manner of relief to others. My heart is
always open to the sufferings of others; and I will not close my heart to the
sufferings of others, even though because of this I have been scornfully
nicknamed "dump"; that is, [because] everyone dumps his pain into
my heart. [To this] I answered that everyone has a place in my heart and I,
in return, have a place in the Heart of Jesus. Taunts regarding the law of
love will not narrow my heart. My soul is always sensitive on this point, and
Jesus alone is the motive for my love of neighbor.
944 + There are moments when I
mistrust myself, when I feel my own weakness and wretchedness in the most
profound depths of my own being, and I have noticed that I can endure such
moments only by trusting in the infinite mercy of God. Patience, prayer and
silence-these are what give strength to the soul. There are moments when one
should be silent, and when it would be inappropriate to talk with creatures;
these are the moments when one is dissatisfied with oneself, and when the
soul feels as weak as a little child. Then the soul clings to God with all
its might. At such times, I live solely by faith, and when I feel
strengthened by God's grace, then I am more courageous in speaking and
communicating with my neighbors.
1039 + I suffer great pain at the
sight of the sufferings of others. All these sufferings are reflected in my
heart. I carry their torments in my heart so that it even wears me out
physically. I would like all pains to fall upon me so as to bring relief to
my neighbor.
1209 Jesus, I trust in You.
Novena to The Divine Mercy [206]
which Jesus instructed me to write down and
make before the Feast of Mercy. It begins on Good Friday.
I desire that during these nine days you bring
souls to ' the fount of My mercy,
that they may draw therefrom strength and
refreshment and whatever graces
they need in the hardships of life and,
especially, at the hour of death.
On each day you will bring to My Heart a
different group of souls, and you will
immerse them in this ocean of My mercy, and I
will bring all these souls into the
house of My Father. You will do this in this
life and in the next. I will deny nothing
to any soul whom you will bring to the fount
of My mercy. On each day you will
beg My Father, on the strength of My bitter
Passion, for graces for these souls.
I answered, "Jesus, I do not know how to
make this novena or which souls to bring first into Your Most Compassionate
Heart." Jesus replied that He would tell me which souls to bring each
day into His Heart.
1662 + O Christ, suffering for You
is the delight of my heart and my soul. Prolong my sufferings to infinity,
that I may give You a proof of my love. I accept everything that Your hand
will hold out to me. Your love, Jesus, is enough for me. I will glorify You
in abandonment and darkness, in agony and fear, in pain and bitterness, in
anguish of spirit and grief of heart. In all things may You be blessed. My
heart is so detached from the earth, that You Yourself are enough for me.
There is no longer any moment in my life for self concern.
1663 Holy Thursday [April 14,
1938]. Today I felt strong enough to take part in the ceremonies of the Church.
During Holy Mass, Jesus stood before me and said, Look into My Heart and see
there the love and mercy which I have for humankind, and especially for
sinners. Look, and enter into My Passion. In an instant, I experienced and
lived through the whole Passion of Jesus in my own heart. I was surprised
that these tortures did not deprive me of my life.
1664 During adoration, Jesus said
to me, My daughter, know that your ardent love and the compassion you have
for Me were a consolation to Me in the Garden [of Olives].
1665 During Holy Hour in the
evening, I heard the words, You see My
mercy for sinners, which at this moment is revealing itself in all its power.
See how little you have written about it; it is only a single drop. Do what
is in your power, so that sinners may come to know My goodness.
1666 Good Friday [April 15, 1938]. I saw the Lord Jesus,
tortured, but not nailed to the Cross. It was still before the crucifixion,
and He said to me, You are My Heart. Speak to sinners about My
mercy. And the Lord gave me interior knowledge of the whole abyss of His
mercy for souls, and I learned that that which I had written is truly a drop.
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-26, 77, 93, 96-98, 101 116, 118, 147)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-173, 163, 216, 241, 267, 275)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-278-279, 281, 287, 282-283, 294)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-296, 343, 375, 383, 414)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-549, 571, 590, 640, 648, 692)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-700, 704, 742)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-791, 796, 856, 861, 871, 944)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1029, 1039, 1209)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-VI-1662-1666)
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