The Master and the Slave
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Saturday of the
Fifth Week of Easter
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Father Patrick Langan, LC
John 15: 18-21
Jesus said to his
disciples: "If the world hates you, realize that it hated me first. If
you belonged to the world, the world would love its own; but because you do
not belong to the world, and I have chosen you out of the world, the world
hates you. Remember the word I spoke to you, ´No slave is greater than his
master.´ If they persecuted me, they will also persecute you. If they kept my
word, they will also keep yours. And they will do all these things to you on
account of my name, because they do not know the one who sent me."
Introductory Prayer:
Lord, thank You for
granting me the opportunity to be with You. There are things in life, Lord,
that attract me, but You attract me more. I hope in You, and I love You.
Maybe I don’t really understand what it means to love, and maybe I don’t love
the way I should, but I do love You.
Petition: Lord, help me to embrace my cross joyfully.
1. Bearing the
Burden: “The world hated me
first.” This is the incredible story of the Gospels. Christ came and the
culture was against him. As the story of Christ in the Gospel progresses, the
forces of antagonism get worse: The dangers increase with the turning of every
page. This was a real burden for Christ, the burden of a parent whose
children turn against him. Perhaps I, too, feel that burden. Perhaps I
experience that rejection from those who love me or from those who don’t
believe.
2. Loving
Acceptance: Christ courageously
and lovingly accepted that burden. He did not complain. Perhaps he asked his
Father for an easier way. It is the same in our lives. I often face problems,
even when I want to do good. There comes a moment in life when I must accept
my limitations and the limitations imposed on me by others. This is a
memorable moment in life—the moment I accept my cross, like Christ did. That
acceptance isn’t easy, but at the same time it fills my heart with a deep
peace and sometimes even joy.
3. Seeking Solutions:
After I accept my
cross, I experience a new courage, and my imagination fires up. Love always
looks for solutions: Christ never stopped searching for ways to get through
to the culture. I must do the best I can to evangelize, even though I may
encounter opposition. With Christ’s help, no obstacle is too great. He will
help me to overcome all the problems I may encounter. The important thing is
that I keep focused on the fulfillment of his will out of love. He will take
care of the rest.
Conversation with
Christ: Lord, You know my
burden. You know what makes me lose sleep, what I wake up worrying about.
Help me to accept it, as You accepted Your cross.
Resolution: I will stop complaining and see what I can
do to alleviate the burdens and sufferings of others.
Excerpts from the DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
82 I will not allow myself to be
so absorbed in the whirlwind of work as to forget about God. I will spend all
my free moments at the feet of the Master hidden in the Blessed Sacrament. He
has been tutoring me from my most tender years.
110 O Divine Master, what happens
in my soul is Your work alone! You, O Lord, are not afraid to place the soul
on the edge of a terrible precipice where it stands, alarmed and filled with
fright, and then You call it back again to Yourself. These are Your
imponderable mysteries.
174 At that moment the priest came
in and began the conference. He spoke for a short time, as if he were in a
hurry. After the conference, he went over to the confessional. Seeing that
none of the sisters were going there, I sprang from my kneeler, and in an
instant was in the confessional. There was no time to deliberate. Instead of
telling the father about the doubts that had been sown in me in respect to my
dealings with the Lord Jesus, I began to speak about these temptations I have
just described above. The confessor immediately understood my situation and
said, "Sister, you distrust the Lord Jesus because He treats you so
kindly. Well, Sister, be completely at peace. Jesus is your Master, and your
communing with Him is neither daydreaming nor hysteria nor illusion. Know
that you are on the right path. Please try to be faithful to these graces;
you are not free to shun them. You do not need at all, Sister, to tell your
superiors about these interior graces, unless the Lord Jesus instructs you
clearly to do so, and even then you should first consult with your confessor.
But if the Lord Jesus demands something external, in this case, after
consulting your confessor, you should carry out what He asks of you, even if
this costs you greatly. On the other hand, you must tell your confessor
everything. There is absolutely no other course for you to take, Sister. Pray
that you may find a spiritual director, or else you will waste these great gifts
of God. I repeat once again, be at peace; you are following the right path.
Take no heed of anything else, but always be faithful to the Lord Jesus, no
matter what anyone says about you. It is with just such miserable souls that
the Lord Jesus communes in this intimate way. And the more you humble
yourself, the more the Lord Jesus will unite Himself with you." 175 176
177
195 O Jesus, today my soul is as though darkened by
suffering. Not a single ray of light. The storm is raging, and Jesus is
asleep. O my Master, I will not wake You; I will not interrupt Your sweet
sleep. I believe that You fortify me without my knowing it.
Throughout the long hours I adore You, O living Bread, amidst the great drought in my soul. O Jesus, pure Love, I do not need consolations; I am nourished by Your will, O Mighty One! Your will is the goal of my existence. It seems to me that the whole world serves me and depends on me. You, O Lord, understand my soul with all its aspirations. Jesus, when I myself cannot sing You the hymn of love, I admire the singing of the Seraphim, they who are so dearly loved by You. I desire to drown myself in You as they do. Nothing will stem such love, for no might has power over it. It is like lightning that illuminates the darkness, but does not remain in it. O my Master, shape my soul according to Your will and Your eternal designs!
218 I am beginning
the retreat today. Jesus, my Master, guide me. Govern me according to Your
will, purify my love that it may be worthy of You, do with me as Your most
merciful Heart desires. Jesus, there will be just the two of us during these
days until the moment of our union. Keep me, Jesus, in a recollected spirit!
+O Jesus, hidden in the Blessed Sacrament, 228 You see that in pronouncing my perpetual vows I am leaving the novitiate[68] today. Jesus, You know how weak and little I am, and so from today on, I am entering Your novitiate in a very special way. I continue to be a novice, but Your novice, Jesus, and You will be my Master to the last day. Daily I will attend lectures at Your feet. I will not do the least thing by myself, without consulting You first as my Master. Jesus, how happy I am that You yourself have drawn me and taken me into Your novitiate; that is to say, into the tabernacle. In making my perpetual vows, I have by no means become a perfect nun. No, no! I am still a weak little novice of Jesus, and I must strive to acquire perfection as I did in the first days of the novitiate, and I will make every effort to keep the same disposition of soul which I had on that first day the convent gate opened to admit me. With the trust and simplicity of a small child, I give myself to You today, O Lord Jesus, my Master. I leave You complete freedom in directing my soul. Guide me along the paths You wish. I won't question them. I will follow You trustingly. Your merciful Heart can do all things!
295 +At that moment Jesus asked me, My child, how is
your retreat going? I answered, "But Jesus, You know how it is
going." Yes, I know, but I want to hear it from your own lips and
from your heart. "O my Master, when You are leading me, everything
goes smoothly, and I ask You, Lord, to never leave my side." And Jesus
said, Yes, I will be with you always, if you always remain a little child
and fear nothing. As I was your beginning here, so I will also be your end.
Do not rely on creatures, even in the smallest things, because this
displeases Me. I want to be alone in your soul. I will give light and
strength to your soul, and you will learn from My representative that I am in
you, and your uncertainty will vanish like mist before the rays of the sun.
485 I accept joy or suffering, praise or humiliation with
the same disposition. I remember that one and the other are passing. What
does it matter to me what people say about me? I have long ago given up
everything that concerns my person. My name is host-or sacrifice, not in
words but in deeds, in the emptying of myself and in becoming like You on the
Cross, O good Jesus, my Master!
569 December 15,
1935. From early morning, today, a strange power has been pushing me to
action, not giving me a moment's peace. A strange ardor has been lit in my
heart, urging me to action, and I cannot stop it. This is a secret martyrdom
known only to God, but let Him do with me as He pleases; my heart is ready
for anything. O Jesus, my dearest Master, do not abandon me, not even for a
moment. Jesus, You know well how weak I am of myself; that is why I know that
it is my weakness that forces You to be with me constantly.
650 O my Jesus, my Master and
Director, strengthen and enlighten me in these difficult moments of my life.
I expect no help from people; all my hope is in You. I feel alone in the face
of Your demands, O Lord. Despite the fears and qualms of my nature, I am
fulfilling Your holy will and desire to fulfill it as faithfully as possible
throughout my life and in my death. Jesus, with You I can do all things. Do
with me as You please; only give me Your merciful Heart and that is enough
for me.
O Jesus my Lord, help me. Let what You have planned before all ages happen to me. I am ready at each beckoning of Your holy will. Enlighten my mind that I may know Your will. O God, You who pervade my soul, You know that I desire nothing but Your glory. O Divine Will, You are the delight of my heart, the food of my soul, the light of my intellect, the omnipotent strength of my will; for when I unite myself with Your will, O Lord, Your power works through me and takes the place of my feeble will. Each day, I seek to carry out God's wishes.
662 July 17. O my
Jesus, You know how much adversity I encounter in this matter, how much
reproach I must put up with, how many ironic smiles I must take with equanimity.
Oh, alone I would not be able to survive this, but with You, my Master, I can
do all things. Oh, how painfully an ironic smile wounds, especially when one
[appears to] speak with great sincerity.
670 O Jesus, my Master and my
Director, it is only with You that I can converse. With no one else is it so
easy to talk as with You, O God.
688
Jesus, Life and Truth, my Master, guide every step of my life, that I may act
according to Your holy will.
704 I spend every free moment at the feet
of the hidden God. He is my Master; I ask Him about everything; I speak to
Him about everything. Here I obtain strength and light; here I learn
everything; here I am given light on how to act toward my neighbor. From the
time I left the novitiate, I have enclosed myself in the tabernacle together
with Jesus, my Master. He himself drew me into the fire of living love on
which everything converges.
725 +
Eight-day Retreat, October 20, 1936.
My Jesus, I am going into the wilderness today to speak only with You, my Master and my Lord. Let the earth be silent, and You alone speak to me, Jesus. You know that I understand no other voice but Yours, O Good Shepherd. In the dwelling of my heart is that wilderness to which no creature has access. There, You alone are King.
732 + The great majesty of God
which pervaded me today and still pervades me awoke in me a great fear, but a
fear filled with respect, and not the fear of a slave, which is quite
different from the fear of respect. This fear animated by respect arose in my
heart today because of love and the knowledge of the greatness of God, and
that is a great joy to the soul. The soul trembles before the smallest
offense against God; but that does not trouble or darken its happiness.
There, where love is in charge, all is well.
824 In this
seclusion, Jesus himself is my Master. He himself educates and instructs me.
I feel that I am the object of His special action. For His inscrutable
purposes and unfathomable decrees, He unites me to Himself in a special way
and allows me to penetrate His incomprehensible mysteries. There is one
mystery which unites me with the Lord, of which no one-not even angels-may
know. And even if I wanted to tell of it, I would not know how to express it.
And yet, I live by it and will live by it forever. This mystery distinguishes
me from every other soul here on earth or in eternity.
845 Before the
vigil supper, I entered the chapel for a moment to break the wafer
spiritually with those dear to my heart. I presented them all, by name, to
Jesus and begged for graces on their behalf. But that wasn't all. I commended
to the Lord all those who are being persecuted, those who are suffering,
those who do not know His Name, and especially poor sinners. O little Jesus,
I fervently ask You, enclose them all in the ocean of Your incomprehensible
mercy. O sweet little Jesus, here is my heart; let it be a little cozy
dwelling place for Yourself. O Infinite Majesty, with what sweetness You drew
close to us. Here, there is no dread of the thunderbolts of the great
Jehovah; here, there is the sweet little Jesus. Here, no soul is afraid,
although Your majesty has not lessened, but only concealed itself. After
supper, I felt very tired and was in pain. I had to lie down. But I kept
vigil with the Most Holy Mother, awaiting the arrival of the little Child.
871 + My Master, cause my heart never to
expect help from anyone, but I will always strive to bring assistance,
consolation and all manner of relief to others. My heart is always open to
the sufferings of others; and I will not close my heart to the sufferings of
others, even though because of this I have been scornfully nicknamed
"dump"; that is, [because] everyone dumps his pain into my heart.
[To this] I answered that everyone has a place in my heart and I, in return,
have a place in the Heart of Jesus. Taunts regarding the law of love will not
narrow my heart. My soul is always sensitive on this point, and Jesus alone
is the motive for my love of neighbor.
875 Today, I
experienced a great suffering during the visit of our sisters. I learned of
something that hurt me terribly, but I controlled myself so that the sisters
didn't notice anything. For some time, the pain was tearing my heart apart,
but all that is for the sake of poor sinners.... O Jesus, for poor
sinners.... Jesus, my strength, stay close to me, help me....
876 January 10,
1937. I asked the Lord today to give me strength in the morning so that I
could go to receive Holy Communion. My Master, I ask You with all my
thirsting heart to give me, if this is according to Your holy will, any
suffering and weakness that You like-I want to suffer all day and all
night-but please, I fervently beg You, strengthen me for the one moment when
I am to receive Holy Communion. You see very well, Jesus, that here they do
not bring Holy Communion to the sick; so, if You do not strengthen me for
that moment so that I can go down to the chapel, how can I receive You in the
Mystery of Love? And You know how much my heart longs for You. O my sweet
Spouse, what's the good of all these reasoning's? You know how ardently I
desire You, and if You so choose You can do this for me.
On the following
morning, I felt as if I were perfectly well; the faintings and the weaknesses
ceased. But as soon as I returned from the chapel, all the sufferings and
weaknesses immediately returned, as if they had been waiting for me. But I
had no fear of them at all, because I had been nourished by the Bread of the
Strong. I boldly look at everything; even death itself I look straight in the
eye.
877 + O Jesus concealed in the Host, my
sweet Master and faithful Friend, how happy my soul is to have such a Friend
who always keeps me company. I do not feel lonely even though I am in
isolation. Jesus-Host, we know each other-that is enough for me.
885 Jesus, give me
the strength and wisdom to get through this terrible wilderness, that my heart
may bear patiently this longing for You, O my Lord! I always remain in holy
amazement when I
sense that You are approaching me, You, the Lord of the awesome
throne; that You
descend to this miserable exile and visit this poor beggar who has nothing but
misery! I do not know how to entertain You, my Royal Prince, but You know
that I love You with every beat of my heart. I see how You lower yourself,
but nevertheless Your majesty does not diminish in my eyes. I know that You
love me with the love of a bridegroom, and that is enough for me. Although we
are separated by a great chasm, for You are the Creator and I am Your
creature, nevertheless, love alone explains our union. Without it, all is
incomprehensible. Only love makes it possible to understand these incomprehensible
intimacies with which You visit me. O Jesus, Your greatness terrifies me, and
I would be in constant astonishment and fear, if You yourself did not set me
at peace. You make me capable of communing with You before each approach.
892 Today the Lord
gave me to know, in spirit, about the Convent of Divine Mercy. I saw a great
spirit in this convent, but everything was poor and very scanty. O my Jesus,
you are allowing me to live in spirit with these souls, but perhaps I shall
never set foot there; but may Your Name be blessed, and whatever You have
intended, may it be done.
908 + O Jesus, how
sorry I feel for poor sinners. Jesus, grant them contrition and repentance. Remember
Your own sorrowful Passion. I know Your infinite mercy and cannot bear it
that a soul that has cost You so much should perish. Jesus, give me the souls
of sinners; let Your mercy rest upon them. Take everything away from me, but
give me souls. I want to become a sacrificial host for sinners. Let the shell
of my body conceal my offering, for Your Most Sacred Heart is also hidden in
a Host, and certainly You are a living sacrifice.
Transform me into
Yourself, O Jesus, that I may be a living sacrifice and pleasing to You. I desire
to atone at each moment for poor sinners. The sacrifice of my spirit is
hidden under the veil of the body; the human eye does not perceive it, and
for that reason it is pure and pleasing to You. O my Creator and Father of
great mercy, I trust in You, for You are Goodness Itself. Souls, do not be
afraid of God, but trust in Him, for He is good, and His mercy is
everlasting.
912 Then I heard
the following words spoken thus: I want you to be My spouse. Fear
pierced my soul, but I calmly continued to reflect on what sort of an
espousal this could be. However, each time fear would invade my soul, a power
from on high would give it peace. After all, I have taken perpetual vows, and
I have taken them of my own completely free will. And so I continued to
reflect on what this could mean. I sensed, and came to realize, that this was
some special kind of grace. Whenever I think about it, I feel faint for God,
but in this swooning, my mind is clear and penetrated with light. When I am
united to Him, I faint from an abundance of happiness, but my mind is bright
and clear and free from all shadows. You a base Your majesty to dwell with a
poor creature. Thank you, O Lord, for this great grace that makes it possible
for me to commune with You. Jesus, Your Name is my delight, I have a
presentiment of my Beloved from afar, and my languishing soul rests in His
embrace; I don't know how to live without Him. I would rather be with Him in
afflictions and suffering than without Him in the greatest heavenly delights.
920
+There is a woman here [165] who was once one of our students. Naturally, she puts my
patience to the test. She comes to see me several times a day. After each of
these visits I am tired out, but I see that the Lord Jesus has sent that soul
to me. Let everything glorify You, O Lord. Patience gives glory to God. O how
poor the souls are!
927 On these two
days, I received Holy Communion as an act of reparation, and I said to the Lord,
"Jesus, I offer everything today for sinners. Let the blows of Your
justice fall on me, and the sea of Your mercy engulf the poor sinners."
And the Lord heard my prayer: many souls returned to the Lord, but I was in
agony under the yoke of God's justice. I felt I was the object of the anger
of the Most High God. By evening my sufferings had reached such a stage of
interior desolation that moans welled up involuntarily from my breast. I
locked the door of my room and began an adoration; that is to say, a Holy
Hour. Interior desolation and an experience of God's justice-that was my
prayer; and the moans and pain that welled up from my soul took the place of
a sweet conversation with the Lord.
929 When I had
rested near His sweetest Heart, I told Him, "Jesus, I have so much to
tell You." And the Lord said to me with great love, Speak, My
daughter. And I started to enumerate the pains of my heart; that is, how
greatly concerned I am for all mankind, that "they all do not know You,
and those who do know You do not love You as You deserve to be loved. I also see
how terribly sinners offend You; and then again, I see how severely the
faithful, especially Your servants, are oppressed and persecuted. And then,
too, I see many souls rushing headlong into the terrible abyss of hell. You
see, Jesus, this is the pain that gnaws at my heart and bones. And, although
You show me special love and inundate my heart with streams of Your joys,
nevertheless, this does not appease the sufferings I have just mentioned, but
rather they penetrate my poor heart all the more acutely. Oh, how ardently I desire
that all mankind turn with trust to Your mercy. Then, seeing the glory of
Your name, my heart will be comforted."
Jesus listened to
these outpourings of my heart with gravity and interest, as if He had known nothing
about them, and this seemed to make it easier for me to talk. And the Lord
said to me, My daughter, those words of your heart are pleasing to Me, and
by saying the chaplet you are bringing humankind closer to Me. After
these words, I found myself alone, but the presence of God is always in my
soul.
934 Small practices
for Lent. Although I wish and desire to do so, I cannot practice big
mortifications as
before, because I am under the strict surveillance of the doctor. But I can practice
little things: first-sleep without a pillow; keep myself a little hungry;
every day, with my arms outstretched, say the chaplet which the Lord taught
me; occasionally, with arms outstretched, for an indefinite period of time
pray informally. Intention: to beg divine mercy for poor sinners, and for
priests, the power to bring sinful hearts to repentance.
936 + A certain
person in our ward was beginning to die. Amidst terrible tortures, she was
dying for three days, sometimes regaining consciousness. Everyone in the ward
was praying for her. I longed to go to her, but Mother Superior had forbidden
me to go to visit the dying, so I prayed for that poor soul in my room. But
when I heard that she was still in agony, and there was no saying how long it
was going to take, I suddenly felt inspired in my soul and said to the Lord,
"Jesus, if all I do is pleasing to You, I ask You, as evidence, to let
that soul stop suffering and pass on immediately to her happy eternity."
A few minutes later I learned that the person had passed away so peacefully
and quickly that they did not even have time to light the candle.
953 + February 15,
1937. Today my suffering increased somewhat: I not only feel greater pain all
through my lungs, but also some strange pains in my intestines. I am suffering
as much as my weak nature can bear, all for immortal souls, to plead the
mercy of God for poor sinners and to beg for strength for priests. Oh, how
much reverence I have for priests; and I am asking Jesus, the High Priest, to
grant them many graces.
1001 +
J.M.J.
Thank You, O Lord, my Master, That You have transformed me entirely into Yourself, And accompany me through life's toils and labors; I fear nothing when I have You in my heart.
+ J. M. J.
1002 The Lord's Supper is laid,
Jesus sits down at table with His Apostles, His Being all transformed into love, For such was the Holy Trinity's counsel. With great desire, I desire to eat with you, Before I suffer death. About to leave you, love holds Me in your midst. He sheds His Blood, gives His life, for He loves immensely. Love hides beneath the appearance of bread, Departing, He remains with us. Such self-abasement was not needed, Yet burning love hid Him under these species. Over the bread and wine He says these words: "This is My Blood, this is My Body." Although mysterious, these are words of love. Then He passes the Cup among His disciples. Jesus grew deeply troubled within And said, "One of you will betray his Master." They fell silent, with a silence as of the tomb, And John inclined his head on His breast. The supper is ended. Let us go to Gethsemane. Love is satisfied, And there the traitor is waiting.
1007 + Praise and glory be to You,
O Holy Trinity, Eternal God. May the mercy springing from Your very bowels
protect us from Your just anger. Let the praise of Your incomprehensible
mercy resound everywhere. All Your works bear the seal of Your unfathomable
mercy, O God.
1064 + O my most sweet Master,
good Jesus, I give You my heart. You shape and mold it after Your liking. O
fathomless love, I open the calyx of my heart to You, like a rosebud to the
freshness of dew. To You alone, my Betrothed, is known the fragrance of the
flower of my heart. Let the fragrance of my sacrifice be pleasing to You. O
Immortal God, my everlasting delight, already here on earth You are my
heaven. May every beat of my heart be a new hymn of praise to You, O Holy
Trinity! Had I as many hearts as there are drops of water in the ocean or
grains of sand in the whole world, I would offer them all to You, O my Love,
O Treasure of my heart! Whomever I shall meet in my life, no matter who they
may be, I want to draw them all to love You, O my Jesus, my Beauty, my
Repose, my sole Master, Judge, Savior and Spouse, all in one; I know that one
title will modify the other-I have entrusted everything to Your mercy.
1156 The second is
prayer joined to the act of mercy. In particular, they will defend the souls
of children against the spirit of evil. Prayer and merciful deeds are all
that will be required of these souls, and even the poorest persons can be
admitted to their number. And in this egoistic world they will try to rouse
up love, the mercy of Jesus.
1167 Satan has
admitted to me that I am the object of his hatred. He said that "a
thousand souls do me less harm than you do when you speak of the great mercy
of the Almighty One. The greatest sinners regain confidence and return to
God, and I lose everything. But what is more, you persecute me personally
with that unfathomable mercy of the Almighty One." I took note of the
great hatred Satan has for the Mercy of God. He does not want to acknowledge
that God is good.
1158 A member of
this group ought to perform at least one act of mercy a day; at least one,
but there can be many more, for such deeds can easily be carried out by
anyone, even the very poorest. For there are three ways of performing an act
of mercy: the merciful word, by forgiving and by comforting; secondly, if you
can offer no word, then pray-that too is mercy; and thirdly, deeds of mercy.
And when the Last Day comes, we shall be judged from this, and on this basis
we shall receive the eternal verdict.
1274 I experience
great torments of soul when I see God offended. Today I recognized that
mortal sins were being committed not far from our door. It was evening. I
prayed earnestly in the chapel, and then I went to scourge myself. When I
knelt down to pray, however, the Lord allowed me to experience how a soul
rejected by God suffers. It seems to me that my heart was torn to pieces, and
at the same time I understood how much such a soul wounds the most merciful
Heart of Jesus. The poor creature does not want to accept God's mercy. The
more God has pursued a soul with His mercy, the more just will He be towards
it.
1282 + When the
same poor people come to the gate a second time, I treat them with greater
gentleness, and I do not let them see that I know they have been here before;
[I do this] in order not to embarrass them. And then they speak to me freely
about their troubles and needs.
Although Sister N.
tells me that is not the way to deal with beggars, and slams the door in
their faces, when she is not there, I treat them as my Master would.
Sometimes more is given when giving nothing, than when giving much in a rude
manner.
1309 When I make the Way of the Cross,
I am deeply moved at the twelfth station. Here I reflect on the omnipotence of
God's mercy which passed through the Heart of Jesus. In this open wound of the
Heart of Jesus I enclose all poor humans... and those individuals whom I love,
as often as I make the Way of the Cross. From that Fount of Mercy issued the
two rays; that is, the Blood and the Water. With the immensity of their grace
they flood the whole world....
1312 + Jesus came
to the main entrance today, under the guise of a poor young man. This young
man, emaciated, barefoot and bareheaded, and with his clothes in tatters, was
frozen because the day was cold and rainy. He asked for something hot to eat.
So I went to the kitchen, but found nothing there for the poor. But, after
searching around for some time, I succeeded in finding some soup, which I
reheated and into which I crumbled some bread, and I gave it to the poor
young man, who ate it. As I was taking the bowl from him, he gave me to know
that He was the Lord of heaven and earth. When I saw Him as He was, He
vanished from my sight. When I went back in and reflected on what had
happened at the gate, I heard these words in my soul: My daughter, the
blessings of the poor who bless Me as they leave this gate have
reached My ears. And your compassion, within the bounds of obedience,
has pleased Me, and this is why I came down from My throne-to taste the
fruits of your mercy.
1313 O my Jesus,
now everything is clear to me, and I understand all that has just happened. I
somehow felt and asked myself what sort of a poor man is this who radiates
such modesty. From that moment on, there was stirred up in my heart an even
purer love toward the poor and the needy. Oh, how happy I am that my
superiors have given me such a task! I understand that mercy is manifold; one
can do good always and everywhere and at all times. An ardent love of God
sees all around itself constant opportunities to share itself through deed,
word and prayer. Now I understand the words which You spoke to me, O Lord,
some time ago.
1487 Jesus: Poor
soul, I see that you suffer much and that you do not have even the strength
to coverse with me. So I will speak to you. Even though your sufferings were
very great, do not lose heart or give in to despondency. But tell Me, my
child, who has dared to wound your heart? Tell me about everything, be
sincere in dealing with Me, reveal all the wounds of your heart. I will heal
them, and your suffering will become a source of your sanctification.
Soul: Lord, my
sufferings are so great and numerous and have lasted so long that I become discouraged.
Jesus: My child,
do not be discouraged. I know your boundless trust in Me; I know
you are aware of My
goodness and mercy. Let us talk in detail about everything
that weighs so
heavily upon your heart.
Soul: There are so
many different things that I do not know what to speak about first, nor how
to express it.
Jesus: Talk to
Me simply, as a friend to a friend. Tell Me now, My child, what hinders you
from advancing in holiness?
Soul: Poor health
detains me on the way to holiness. I cannot fulfill my duties. I am as
useless as an extra
wheel on a wagon. I cannot mortify myself or fast to any extent, as the saints
did. Furthermore, nobody believes I am sick, so that mental pain is added to
those of the body, and I am often humiliated. Jesus, how can anyone become
holy in such circumstances?
Jesus: True, My
child, all that is painful. But there is no way to heaven except the
way of the cross. I
followed it first. You must learn that it is the shortest and
surest way.
Soul: Lord, there
is another obstacle on the road to holiness. Because I am faithful to You, I am
persecuted and suffer much.
Jesus: It is
because you are not of this world that the world hates you. First it
persecuted Me.
Persecution is a sign that you are following in My footsteps
faithfully.
Soul: My Lord, I am
also discouraged because neither my superiors nor my confessor
understand my
interior trials. A darkness clouds my mind. How can I advance? All this
discourages me from
striving for the heights of sanctity.
Jesus: Well, My
child, this time you have told Me a good deal. I realize how painful
it is not to be
understood, and especially by those whom one loves and with whom one has been
very open. But suffice it to know that I understand all your troubles and
misery. I am pleased by the deep faith you have, despite everything, in My representatives.
Learn from this that no one will understand a soul entirely-that is beyond
human ability. Therefore, I have remained on earth to comfort your aching heart
and to fortify your soul, so that you will not falter on the way. You say
that a dense darkness is obscuring your mind. But why, at such times, do you
not come to Me, the light who can in an instant pour into your soul more
understanding about holiness than can be found in any books? No confessor is
capable of teaching and enlightening a soul in this way. Know, too, that the
darkness about which you complain I first endured in the Garden of Olives
when My Soul was crushed in mortal anguish. I am giving you a share in those
sufferings because of My special love for you and in view of the high degree
of holiness I am intending for you in heaven. A suffering soul is closest to
My Heart.
Soul: One more
thing, Lord. What should I do when I am ignored and rejected by people, especially
by those on whom I had a right to count in times of greatest need?
Jesus: My child,
make the resolution never to rely on people. Entrust yourself
completely to My
will saying, "Not as I want, but according to Your will, O God, let
it be done unto
me." These words, spoken from the depths of one's heart, can
raise a soul to the
summit of sanctity in a short time. In such a soul I delight. Such a soul
gives Me glory. Such a soul fills heaven with the fragrance of her virtue.
But understand that the strength by which you bear sufferings comes from
frequent Communions. So approach this fountain of mercy often, to draw with
the vessel of trust whatever you need.
Soul: Thank You,
Lord, for Your goodness in remaining with us in this exile as the God of mercy
and blessing us with the radiance of Your compassion and goodness. It is
through the light of Your mercy that I have come to understand how much You
love me.
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-82, 110, 174, 195, 218,
228, 295, 485)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-569, 650, 662, 670,
688, 704, 725, 732)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-824, 845, 871, 875,
877, 885, 892, 908)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-912, 920, 927, 929,
934, 936, 953)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1001-1002, 1007,
1064, 1156, 1167)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1158)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-IV-1274, 1282, 1309,
1312, 1313)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-V-1487)
http://www.saint-faustina.com/Diary/DMIMS10.shtml
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