The Gift of Faith
Saturday of the Twenty-Fifth Week in Ordinary Time (Sept. 28, 2013)
Luke 9:43b-45
While they were all amazed at his every deed, Jesus said to his
disciples, "Pay attention to what I am telling you. The Son of Man is to
be handed over to men." But they did not understand this saying; its
meaning was hidden from them so that they should not understand it, and they
were afraid to ask him about this saying.
Introductory Prayer: Lord, You are the author of life and
the giver of all that is good. You are the Prince of Peace and my mainstay. You
are my healer and the cure itself. I need
You, and I need to give You. I love You and commit myself to you
entirely, knowing You could never let me down or deceive me. Thank You for
giving me Your very self.
Petition: Lord Jesus, strengthen my weak faith and guide me along Your paths.
1. Blind Faith in Science: There are so many everyday,
day-to-day things that we take for granted. We have a certain “blind faith” in
them: the electricity in our room, the engineering feat of the skyscraper we
work in, etc. It just comes naturally to us. We don’t put much thought
into them. We trust that they will continue to work. Unfortunately, when our
“faith” crosses the line of empirical knowledge – like electricity and
engineering – into the realm of the spiritual, we can find obstacles to our
believing.
2. Supernatural Faith: Understanding of what Our Lord
states about his passion and death in today’s Scriptures can only be obtained
through a “supernatural faith.” This faith is a gift we must seek from God in
all humility, so that it will shed light on the whole of our lives. It will
bring a knowledge greater than just a purely human one. Trusting in Jesus, let
us ask him for this faith.
3. Afraid to Ask: The disciples in today’s Gospel passage were
afraid to question Jesus. Questioning something we do not understand is not
necessarily bad; it is quite normal and reveals a childlike attitude. Christ
always has an answer to our questions – an intelligible answer – even though
our mind may not fully grasp its breadth. In fact, Christ does not want us to
accept his teaching and values in a passive way. He wants us to accept freely,
not so much because we understand fully, but rather because we trust and love
the God who reveals himself to us.
Conversation with Christ: Lord Jesus, it is so easy for me to
look at life from a purely human standpoint. Grant me the eyes of faith to see
all things from Your viewpoint. May my faith enlighten my path all the days of
my life.
Resolution: In my prayer today I will beg, in all humility, for the gift of faith
in Jesus Christ.
Excerpts from the DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
O My God
2 When I look into the future, I am frightened, But why plunge into the future?
Only the present moment is precious to me,
As the future may never enter my soul at all.
It is no longer in my power,
To change, correct or add to the past;
For neither sages nor prophets could do that.
And so, what the past has embraced I must entrust to God.
O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire.
I desire to use you as best I can.
And although I am weak and small,
You grant me the grace of your omnipotence.
And so, trusting in Your mercy,
I walk through life like a little child,
Offering You each day this heart
Burning with love for Your greater glory.
2 When I look into the future, I am frightened, But why plunge into the future?
Only the present moment is precious to me,
As the future may never enter my soul at all.
It is no longer in my power,
To change, correct or add to the past;
For neither sages nor prophets could do that.
And so, what the past has embraced I must entrust to God.
O present moment, you belong to me, whole and entire.
I desire to use you as best I can.
And although I am weak and small,
You grant me the grace of your omnipotence.
And so, trusting in Your mercy,
I walk through life like a little child,
Offering You each day this heart
Burning with love for Your greater glory.
27 First
vows [First profession of temporary vows, April 30, 1928]. An ardent desire to
empty myself for God by an active love, but a love that would be imperceptible,
even to the sisters closest to me.
However, even after the vows, darkness continued to reign in my soul for almost a half year. Once, when I was praying, Jesus pervaded all my soul, darkness melted away, and I heard these words within me: You are My joy; you are My heart's delight. From that moment I felt the Most Holy Trinity in my heart; that is to say, within myself. I felt that I was inundated with Divine light. Since then, my soul has been in intimate communion with God, like a child with its beloved Father.
However, even after the vows, darkness continued to reign in my soul for almost a half year. Once, when I was praying, Jesus pervaded all my soul, darkness melted away, and I heard these words within me: You are My joy; you are My heart's delight. From that moment I felt the Most Holy Trinity in my heart; that is to say, within myself. I felt that I was inundated with Divine light. Since then, my soul has been in intimate communion with God, like a child with its beloved Father.
55 1933. Spiritual Counsel Given
Me by Father Andrasz, S.J.
First: You
must not turn away from these interior inspirations, but always tell everything
to your confessor. If you recognize that these interior inspirations refer to
your own self; that is to say, they are for the good of your soul or for the
good of other souls, l urge you to follow them; and you must not neglect them,
but always do so in consultation with your confessor.
Second: If these inspirations are not in accord with the faith or the spirit of the Church, they must be rejected immediately as coming from the evil spirit.
Third: If these inspirations do not refer to souls, in general, nor specifically to their good, you should not take them too seriously, and it would be better to even ignore them.
But you should not make this decision by yourself, either one way or the other, as you can easily be led astray despite these great favors from God. Humility, humility, and ever humility, as we can do nothing of ourselves; all is purely and simply God's grace.
You say to me that God demands great trust from souls; well then, you be the first to show this trust. And one more word-accept all this with serenity.
Words of one of the confessors: "Sister, God is preparing many special graces for you, but try to make your life as clear as crystal before the Lord, paying no attention to what anyone else thinks about you. Let God suffice you; He alone."
Toward the end of my novitiate, a confessor [perhaps Father Theodore] told me: "Go through life doing good, so that I could write on its pages: `She spent her life doing good.' May God bring this about in you."
Another time the confessor said to me, "Comport yourself before God like the widow in the Gospel; although the coin she dropped into the box was of little value, it counted far more before God than all the big offerings of others."
On another occasion the instruction I received was this: " Act in such a way that all those who come in contact with you will go away joyful. Sow happiness about you because you have received much from God; give, then, generously to others. They should take leave of you with their hearts filled with joy, even if they have no more than touched the hem of your garment. Keep well in mind the words I am telling you right now."
Still another time he gave me the following recommendation: "Let God push your boat out into the deep waters, toward the unfathomable depths of the interior life."
Here are a few words from a conversation I had with the Mother Directress [Mary Joseph] toward the end of my novitiate: "Sister, let simplicity and humility be the characteristic traits of your soul. Go through life like a little child, always trusting, always full of simplicity and humility, content with everything, happy in every circumstance. There, where others fear, you will pass calmly along, thanks to this simplicity and humility. Remember this, Sister, for your whole life: as waters flow from the mountains down into the valleys, so, too, do God's graces flow only into humble souls."
Second: If these inspirations are not in accord with the faith or the spirit of the Church, they must be rejected immediately as coming from the evil spirit.
Third: If these inspirations do not refer to souls, in general, nor specifically to their good, you should not take them too seriously, and it would be better to even ignore them.
But you should not make this decision by yourself, either one way or the other, as you can easily be led astray despite these great favors from God. Humility, humility, and ever humility, as we can do nothing of ourselves; all is purely and simply God's grace.
You say to me that God demands great trust from souls; well then, you be the first to show this trust. And one more word-accept all this with serenity.
Words of one of the confessors: "Sister, God is preparing many special graces for you, but try to make your life as clear as crystal before the Lord, paying no attention to what anyone else thinks about you. Let God suffice you; He alone."
Toward the end of my novitiate, a confessor [perhaps Father Theodore] told me: "Go through life doing good, so that I could write on its pages: `She spent her life doing good.' May God bring this about in you."
Another time the confessor said to me, "Comport yourself before God like the widow in the Gospel; although the coin she dropped into the box was of little value, it counted far more before God than all the big offerings of others."
On another occasion the instruction I received was this: " Act in such a way that all those who come in contact with you will go away joyful. Sow happiness about you because you have received much from God; give, then, generously to others. They should take leave of you with their hearts filled with joy, even if they have no more than touched the hem of your garment. Keep well in mind the words I am telling you right now."
Still another time he gave me the following recommendation: "Let God push your boat out into the deep waters, toward the unfathomable depths of the interior life."
Here are a few words from a conversation I had with the Mother Directress [Mary Joseph] toward the end of my novitiate: "Sister, let simplicity and humility be the characteristic traits of your soul. Go through life like a little child, always trusting, always full of simplicity and humility, content with everything, happy in every circumstance. There, where others fear, you will pass calmly along, thanks to this simplicity and humility. Remember this, Sister, for your whole life: as waters flow from the mountains down into the valleys, so, too, do God's graces flow only into humble souls."
102 After
some time, one of the sisters came into the cell and found me almost dead. She
was frightened and went to find the Directress of Novices who, in the name of
holy obedience ordered me to get up from the ground. My strength returned
immediately, and I got up, trembling. The Directress recognized immediately the
state of my soul and spoke to me about the inscrutable mercy of God, saying,
"Do not be distressed about anything, Sister. I command this of you in
virtue of obedience." Then she said to me, "I see now, Sister, that
God is calling you to a high degree of holiness; the Lord wants to draw you
very close to Himself since He has allowed these things to happen to you so
soon. Be faithful to God, Sister, because this is a sign that He wants you to
have a high place in heaven." However, I did not understand anything of
these words. When I went into the chapel, I felt as though my soul had been set
free from everything, as though I had just come forth from the hand of God. I
perceived the inviolability of my soul; I felt that I was a tiny child.
116 My
Jesus, You know what my soul goes through at the recollection of these
sufferings. I have often marvelled that the angels and saints hold their peace
at the sight of a soul suffering like that. Yet they have special love for us
at such moments. My soul has often cried out after God, as a little child who
cries as loudly as he can when his mother covers her face and he cannot
recognize her. O my Jesus, honor and glory to You for these trials of love!
Great and incomprehensible is your mercy. All that You intended for my soul, O
Lord, is steeped in Your mercy.
148 +A
noble and delicate soul, even the most simple, but one of delicate
sensibilities, sees God in everything, finds Him everywhere, and knows how to
find Him in even the most hidden things. It finds all things important, it
highly appreciates all things, it thanks God for all things, it draws profit
for the soul from all things, and it gives all glory to God. It places its
trust in God and is not confused when the time of ordeals comes. It knows that
God is always the best of Fathers and makes little of human opinion. It follows
faithfully the faintest breath of the Holy Spirit; it rejoices in this
Spiritual Guest and holds onto Him like a child to its mother. Where other
souls come to a standstill and fear, this soul passes on without fear or
difficulty.
184 +Holy
Hour. During this hour, l tried to meditate on the Lord's Passion. But my soul
was filled with joy, and suddenly I saw the Child Jesus. But His majesty
penetrated me to such an extent that I said, "Jesus, You are so little,
and yet I know that You are my Creator and Lord." And Jesus answered me, I
am, and I keep company with you as a child to teach you humility and
simplicity.
I gathered all my sufferings and difficulties into a bouquet for Jesus for the day of our perpetual betrothal. Nothing was difficult for me, when I remembered it was for my Betrothed as proof of my love for Him.
I gathered all my sufferings and difficulties into a bouquet for Jesus for the day of our perpetual betrothal. Nothing was difficult for me, when I remembered it was for my Betrothed as proof of my love for Him.
209 In my
sufferings, I do not seek help from creatures, but God is everything to me. And
yet, it often seems that even the Lord does not hear me. I arm myself with
patience and silence, like a dove that does not complain and feels no
bitterness when its children are being taken away from it. I want to soar into
the very heat of the sun, and I do not want to stop in its vapors. I will not
grow weary, because it is on You that I am leaning-O You, my Strength!
219 In
the evening, the Lord said to me, My daughter, let nothing frighten or
disconcert you. Remain deeply at peace. Everything is in My hands. I will give
you to understand everything through Father Andrasz. Be like a child towards
him.
A Moment
Before the Blessed Sacrament.
220 O my eternal Lord and Creator, how am I going to thank You for this great favor; namely, that You have deigned to choose miserable me to be Your betrothed and that You are to unite me to yourself in an eternal bond? O dearest Treasure of my heart, I offer You all the adoration and thanksgiving of the Saints and of all the choirs of Angels, and I unite myself in a special way with Your Mother. O Mary, my Mother, I humbly beg of You, cover my soul with Your virginal cloak at this very important moment of my life, so that thus I may become dearer to Your Son and may worthily praise Your Son's mercy before the whole world and throughout all eternity.
220 O my eternal Lord and Creator, how am I going to thank You for this great favor; namely, that You have deigned to choose miserable me to be Your betrothed and that You are to unite me to yourself in an eternal bond? O dearest Treasure of my heart, I offer You all the adoration and thanksgiving of the Saints and of all the choirs of Angels, and I unite myself in a special way with Your Mother. O Mary, my Mother, I humbly beg of You, cover my soul with Your virginal cloak at this very important moment of my life, so that thus I may become dearer to Your Son and may worthily praise Your Son's mercy before the whole world and throughout all eternity.
227 +In
the midst of trials I will try to see the loving hand of God. Nothing is as
constant as suffering-it always faithfully keeps the soul company. O Jesus, I
will let no one surpass me in loving You!
+O Jesus, hidden in the Blessed Sacrament,
228 You see that in pronouncing my perpetual vows I am leaving the novitiate[68] today. Jesus, You know how weak and little I am, and so from today on, I am entering Your novitiate in a very special way. I continue to be a novice, but Your novice, Jesus, and You will be my Master to the last day. Daily I will attend lectures at Your feet. I will not do the least thing by myself, without consulting You first as my Master. Jesus, how happy I am that You yourself have drawn me and taken me into Your novitiate; that is to say, into the tabernacle. In making my perpetual vows, I have by no means become a perfect nun. No, no! I am still a weak little novice of Jesus, and I must strive to acquire perfection as I did in the first days of the novitiate, and I will make every effort to keep the same disposition of soul which I had on that first day the convent gate opened to admit me.
With the trust and simplicity of a small child, I give myself to You today, O Lord Jesus, my Master. I leave You complete freedom in directing my soul. Guide me along the paths You wish. I won't question them. I will follow You trustingly. Your merciful Heart can do all things!
The little novice of Jesus-Sister Faustina.
229 +At the beginning of the retreat, Jesus told me, During this retreat, I myself will direct your soul. I want to confirm you in peace and love. And so the first few days passed by. On the fourth day, doubts began to trouble me: Is not this tranquillity of mine false? Then I heard these words, My daughter, imagine that you are the sovereign of all the world and have the power to dispose of all things according to your good pleasure. You have the power to do all the good you want, and suddenly a little child knocks on your door, all trembling and in tears and, trusting in your kindness, asks for a piece of bread lest he die of starvation. What would you do for this child? Answer Me, my daughter. And I said, "Jesus, I would give the child all it asked and a thousand times more. "And the Lord said to me, That is how I am treating your soul. In this retreat I am giving you, not only peace, but also such a disposition of soul that even if you wanted to experience uneasiness you could not do so. My love has taken possession of your soul, and I want you to be confirmed in it. Bring your ear close to My Heart, forget everything else, and meditate upon My wondrous mercy. My love will give you the strength and courage you need in these matters.
+O Jesus, hidden in the Blessed Sacrament,
228 You see that in pronouncing my perpetual vows I am leaving the novitiate[68] today. Jesus, You know how weak and little I am, and so from today on, I am entering Your novitiate in a very special way. I continue to be a novice, but Your novice, Jesus, and You will be my Master to the last day. Daily I will attend lectures at Your feet. I will not do the least thing by myself, without consulting You first as my Master. Jesus, how happy I am that You yourself have drawn me and taken me into Your novitiate; that is to say, into the tabernacle. In making my perpetual vows, I have by no means become a perfect nun. No, no! I am still a weak little novice of Jesus, and I must strive to acquire perfection as I did in the first days of the novitiate, and I will make every effort to keep the same disposition of soul which I had on that first day the convent gate opened to admit me.
With the trust and simplicity of a small child, I give myself to You today, O Lord Jesus, my Master. I leave You complete freedom in directing my soul. Guide me along the paths You wish. I won't question them. I will follow You trustingly. Your merciful Heart can do all things!
The little novice of Jesus-Sister Faustina.
229 +At the beginning of the retreat, Jesus told me, During this retreat, I myself will direct your soul. I want to confirm you in peace and love. And so the first few days passed by. On the fourth day, doubts began to trouble me: Is not this tranquillity of mine false? Then I heard these words, My daughter, imagine that you are the sovereign of all the world and have the power to dispose of all things according to your good pleasure. You have the power to do all the good you want, and suddenly a little child knocks on your door, all trembling and in tears and, trusting in your kindness, asks for a piece of bread lest he die of starvation. What would you do for this child? Answer Me, my daughter. And I said, "Jesus, I would give the child all it asked and a thousand times more. "And the Lord said to me, That is how I am treating your soul. In this retreat I am giving you, not only peace, but also such a disposition of soul that even if you wanted to experience uneasiness you could not do so. My love has taken possession of your soul, and I want you to be confirmed in it. Bring your ear close to My Heart, forget everything else, and meditate upon My wondrous mercy. My love will give you the strength and courage you need in these matters.
230
Jesus, living Host, You are my Mother, You are my all! It is with simplicity
and love, with faith and trust that I will always come to You, O Jesus! I will
share everything with You, as a child with its loving mother, my joys and
sorrows-in a word, everything.
240 Three
requests on the day of my perpetual vows. Jesus, I know that today You will
refuse me nothing.
First request: Jesus, my most beloved Spouse, I beg You for the triumph of the Church, particularly in Russia and in Spain; for blessings on the Holy Father, Pius XI, and on all the clergy; for the grace of conversion for impenitent sinners. And I ask You for a special blessing and for light, O Jesus, for the priests before whom I will make my confessions throughout my lifetime.
Second request :I beg Your blessings on our Congregation, and may it be filled with great zeal. Bless, O Jesus, our Mother General and our Mother Directress, all the novices and all the superiors. Bless my dearest parents. Bestow Your grace, O Jesus, on our wards; strengthen them so powerfully by Your grace so that those who leave our houses will no longer offend You by any sin. Jesus, I beg You for my homeland; protect it against the assaults of its enemies.
Third request:Jesus, I plead with You for the souls that are most in need of prayer. I plead for the dying; be merciful to them. I also beg You, Jesus, to free all souls from purgatory.
Jesus, I commend to You these particular persons: My confessors, persons recommended to my prayers, a certain person..., Father Andrasz, Father Czaputa, and the priest I met in Vilnius [Father Sopocko], who is to be my confessor, a certain soul... a certain priest, a certain religious[70] to whom You know how much I owe, Jesus, and all the people who have been recommended to my prayer. Jesus, on this day You can do everything for those for whom I am pleading. For myself I ask, Lord, transform me completely into Yourself, maintain in me a holy zeal for Your glory, give me the grace and spiritual strength to do Your holy will in all things.
Thank You, o my dearest Bridegroom, for the dignity You have conferred on me, and in particular for the royal coat-of-arms which will adorn me from this day on and which even the Angels do not possess; namely, the cross, the sword and the crown of thorns. But above all, O my Jesus, I thank You for Your Heart-it is all I need.
Mother of God, Most Holy Mary, my Mother, You are my Mother in a special way now because Your beloved Son is my Bridegroom, and thus we are both Your children. For Your Son's sake, You have to love me. O Mary, my dearest Mother, guide my spiritual life in such a way that it will please Your Son.
+Holy and Omnipotent God, at this moment of immense grace by which You are uniting me with Yourself forever, I, mere nothingness, with the utmost gratitude, cast myself at Your feet like a tiny, unknown flower and, each day, the fragrance of that flower of love will ascend to Your throne.
In times of struggle and suffering, of darkness and storm, of yearning and sorrow, in times of difficult trials, in times when nobody will understand me, when I will even be condemned and scorned by everyone, I will remember the day of my perpetual vows, the day of God's incomprehensible grace.
First request: Jesus, my most beloved Spouse, I beg You for the triumph of the Church, particularly in Russia and in Spain; for blessings on the Holy Father, Pius XI, and on all the clergy; for the grace of conversion for impenitent sinners. And I ask You for a special blessing and for light, O Jesus, for the priests before whom I will make my confessions throughout my lifetime.
Second request :I beg Your blessings on our Congregation, and may it be filled with great zeal. Bless, O Jesus, our Mother General and our Mother Directress, all the novices and all the superiors. Bless my dearest parents. Bestow Your grace, O Jesus, on our wards; strengthen them so powerfully by Your grace so that those who leave our houses will no longer offend You by any sin. Jesus, I beg You for my homeland; protect it against the assaults of its enemies.
Third request:Jesus, I plead with You for the souls that are most in need of prayer. I plead for the dying; be merciful to them. I also beg You, Jesus, to free all souls from purgatory.
Jesus, I commend to You these particular persons: My confessors, persons recommended to my prayers, a certain person..., Father Andrasz, Father Czaputa, and the priest I met in Vilnius [Father Sopocko], who is to be my confessor, a certain soul... a certain priest, a certain religious[70] to whom You know how much I owe, Jesus, and all the people who have been recommended to my prayer. Jesus, on this day You can do everything for those for whom I am pleading. For myself I ask, Lord, transform me completely into Yourself, maintain in me a holy zeal for Your glory, give me the grace and spiritual strength to do Your holy will in all things.
Thank You, o my dearest Bridegroom, for the dignity You have conferred on me, and in particular for the royal coat-of-arms which will adorn me from this day on and which even the Angels do not possess; namely, the cross, the sword and the crown of thorns. But above all, O my Jesus, I thank You for Your Heart-it is all I need.
Mother of God, Most Holy Mary, my Mother, You are my Mother in a special way now because Your beloved Son is my Bridegroom, and thus we are both Your children. For Your Son's sake, You have to love me. O Mary, my dearest Mother, guide my spiritual life in such a way that it will please Your Son.
+Holy and Omnipotent God, at this moment of immense grace by which You are uniting me with Yourself forever, I, mere nothingness, with the utmost gratitude, cast myself at Your feet like a tiny, unknown flower and, each day, the fragrance of that flower of love will ascend to Your throne.
In times of struggle and suffering, of darkness and storm, of yearning and sorrow, in times of difficult trials, in times when nobody will understand me, when I will even be condemned and scorned by everyone, I will remember the day of my perpetual vows, the day of God's incomprehensible grace.
242 +O
God, how much I desire to be a small child.[71] You are my Father, and You know how little
and weak I am. So I beg You, keep me close by Your side all my life and
especially at the hour of my death. Jesus, I know that Your goodness surpasses
the goodness of a most tender mother.
244 Now a
gray, ordinary day has begun. The solemn hours of the perpetual vows have
passed, but God's great grace has remained in my soul. I feel I am all God's; I
feel I am His child, I feel I am wholly God's property. I experience this in a
way that can be physically sensed. I am completely at peace about everything,
because I know it is the Spouse's business to look after me. I have forgotten
about myself completely. My trust placed in His Most Merciful Heart has no
limit. I am continuously united with Him. It seems to me as though Jesus could
not be happy without me, nor could I without Him. Although I understand that,
being God, He is happy in himself and has absolutely no need of any creature,
still, His goodness compels Him to give himself to the creature, and with a
generosity which is beyond understanding.
245 My Jesus, I will now strive to give honor and glory to Your Name, doing battle till the day on which You yourself will say, enough! Every soul You have entrusted to me, Jesus, I will try to aid with prayer and sacrifice, so that Your grace can work in them. O great lover of souls, my Jesus, I thank You for this immense confidence with which You have deigned to place souls in our care. O you days of work and of monotony, you are not monotonous to me at all, for each moment brings me new graces and opportunity to do good.
245 My Jesus, I will now strive to give honor and glory to Your Name, doing battle till the day on which You yourself will say, enough! Every soul You have entrusted to me, Jesus, I will try to aid with prayer and sacrifice, so that Your grace can work in them. O great lover of souls, my Jesus, I thank You for this immense confidence with which You have deigned to place souls in our care. O you days of work and of monotony, you are not monotonous to me at all, for each moment brings me new graces and opportunity to do good.
260 I had
permission to visit Czestochowa while on my journey. I saw the Mother of God
[image] for the first time, when I went to attend the unveiling of the image at
five in the morning. I prayed without interruption until eleven, and it seemed
to me that I had just come. The superior of the house there [Mother Serafin[75]] sent a sister for me, to tell me to come to
breakfast and said she was worried that I would miss my train. The Mother of
God told me many things. I entrusted my perpetual vows to Her. I felt that I
was her child and that She was my Mother. She did not refuse any of my
requests.
264 +O my
Jesus, keep me near to You! See how weak I am! I cannot go a step forward by
myself; so You, Jesus, must stand by me constantly like a mother by a helpless
child-and even more so.
274 Jesus
gave me the grace of knowing myself. In this divine light I see my principal
fault; it is pride which takes the form of my closing up within myself and of a
lack of simplicity in my relations with Mother Superior [Irene].
The second light concerns speaking. I sometimes talk too much. A thing could be settled in one or two words, and as for me, I take too much time about it. But Jesus wants me to use that time to say some short indulgenced prayers for the souls in purgatory. And the Lord says that every word will be weighed on the day of judgment.
The third light concerns our rules. I have not sufficiently avoided the occasions that lead to breaking the rules, especially that of silence. I will act as if the rule were written just for me; it should not affect me at all how anyone else might act, as long as I myself act as God wishes.
Resolution. Whatever Jesus demands of me regarding external things, I will immediately go and tell my superiors. I shall strive for childlike openness and frankness in my relations with the superior.
The second light concerns speaking. I sometimes talk too much. A thing could be settled in one or two words, and as for me, I take too much time about it. But Jesus wants me to use that time to say some short indulgenced prayers for the souls in purgatory. And the Lord says that every word will be weighed on the day of judgment.
The third light concerns our rules. I have not sufficiently avoided the occasions that lead to breaking the rules, especially that of silence. I will act as if the rule were written just for me; it should not affect me at all how anyone else might act, as long as I myself act as God wishes.
Resolution. Whatever Jesus demands of me regarding external things, I will immediately go and tell my superiors. I shall strive for childlike openness and frankness in my relations with the superior.
275 Jesus
loves hidden souls. A hidden flower is the most fragrant. I must strive to make
the interior of my soul a resting place for the Heart of Jesus. In difficult
and painful moments, O my Creator, I sing You a hymn of trust, for bottomless
is the abyss of my trust in You and in Your mercy!
282 Once
the Lord said to me, My Heart was moved by great mercy towards you, My
dearest child, when I saw you torn to shreds because of the great pain you
suffered in repenting for your sins. I see your love, so pure and true that I
give you first place among the virgins. You are the honor and glory of My
Passion. I see every abasement of your soul, and nothing escapes my attention.
I lift up the humble even to my very throne, because I want it so.
God, One
in the Holy Trinity.
283 I want to love You as no human soul has ever loved You before; and although I am utterly miserable and small, I have nevertheless cast the anchor of my trust deep down into the abyss of Your mercy, O my God and Creator! In spite of my great misery I fear nothing, but hope to sing You a hymn of glory forever. Let no soul, even the most miserable, fall prey to doubt; for, as long as one is alive, each one can become a great saint, so great is the power of God's grace. It remains only for us not to oppose God's action.
283 I want to love You as no human soul has ever loved You before; and although I am utterly miserable and small, I have nevertheless cast the anchor of my trust deep down into the abyss of Your mercy, O my God and Creator! In spite of my great misery I fear nothing, but hope to sing You a hymn of glory forever. Let no soul, even the most miserable, fall prey to doubt; for, as long as one is alive, each one can become a great saint, so great is the power of God's grace. It remains only for us not to oppose God's action.
284 O
Jesus, if only I could become like mist before Your eyes, to cover the earth so
that You would not see its terrible crimes. Jesus, when I look at the world and
its indifference towards You, again and again it brings tears to my eyes; but
when I look at a cold soul of a religious, my heart bleeds.
290 Once, when I was deeply moved by the thought of eternity and its
mysteries, my soul became fearful; and when I pondered about these a little
longer, I started to be troubled by various doubts. Then Jesus said to me,
My child, do not be afraid of the house of your Father. Leave these vain
inquiries to the wise of this world. I want to see you always as a little
child. Ask your confessor about everything with simplicity, and I will answer
you through his lips.
294 +Once the Lord said to me, Act
like a beggar who does not back away when he gets more alms [than he asked
for], but offers thanks the more fervently. You too should not back away and
say that you are not worthy of receiving greater graces when I give them to
you. I know you are unworthy, but rejoice all the more and take as many
treasures from My Heart as you can carry, for then you will please Me more. And
I will tell you one more thing: Take these graces not only for yourself, but
also for others; that is, encourage the souls with whom you come in contact to
trust in My infinite mercy. Oh, how I love those souls who have complete
confidence in Me. I will do everything for them.
295 +At
that moment Jesus asked me, My child, how is your retreat going? I
answered, "But Jesus, You know how it is going." Yes, I know, but
I want to hear it from your own lips and from your heart. "O my
Master, when You are leading me, everything goes smoothly, and I ask You, Lord,
to never leave my side." And Jesus said, Yes, I will be with you
always, if you always remain a little child and fear nothing. As I was your
beginning here, so I will also be your end. Do not rely on creatures, even in
the smallest things, because this displeases Me. I want to be alone in your
soul. I will give light and strength to your soul, and you will learn from My
representative that I am in you, and your uncertainty will vanish like mist
before the rays of the sun.
296 +O
Supreme Good, I want to love You as no one on earth has ever loved You before!
I want to adore You with every moment of my life and unite my will closely to
Your holy will. My life is not drab or monotonous, but it is varied like a
garden of fragrant flowers, so that I don't know which flower to pick first,
the lily of suffering or the rose of love of neighbor or the violet of
humility. I will not enumerate these treasures in which my every day abounds.
It is a great thing to know how to make use of the present moment.
297
+Jesus, Supreme Light, grant me the grace of knowing myself, and pierce my dark
soul with Your light, and fill the abyss of my soul with Your own self, for You
alone [...]
298 O my
Jesus, the Life, the Way and the Truth, I beg You to keep me close to You as a
mother holds a baby to her bosom, for I am not only a helpless child, but an
accumulation of misery and nothingness.
306 I
asked the Lord to grant me the grace that my nature be immune and resist the
influences that sometimes try to draw me away from the spirit of our rule and
from the minor regulations. These minor transgressions are like little moths
that try to destroy the spiritual life within us, and they surely will destroy
it if the soul is aware of these minor transgressions and yet disregards them
as small things. I can see nothing that is small in the religious life. Little
matter if I am sometimes the object of vexation and jeers, as long as my spirit
remains in harmony with the spirit of the rules, the vows and the religious
statutes.
O my Jesus, delight of my heart, You know my desires. I should like to hide from people's sight so as to be like one alive and yet not living. I want to live pure as a wild flower; I want my love always to be turned to You, just as a flower that is always turning to the sun. I want the fragrance and the freshness of the flower of my heart to be always preserved for You alone. I want to live beneath Your divine gaze, for You alone are enough for me. When I am with You, Jesus, I fear nothing, for nothing can do me harm.
O my Jesus, delight of my heart, You know my desires. I should like to hide from people's sight so as to be like one alive and yet not living. I want to live pure as a wild flower; I want my love always to be turned to You, just as a flower that is always turning to the sun. I want the fragrance and the freshness of the flower of my heart to be always preserved for You alone. I want to live beneath Your divine gaze, for You alone are enough for me. When I am with You, Jesus, I fear nothing, for nothing can do me harm.
315
+Mother of God, Your soul was plunged into a sea of bitterness; look upon Your
child and teach her to suffer and to love while suffering. Fortify my soul that
pain will not break it. Mother of grace, teach me to live by [the power of]
God.
357 +Most
Holy Trinity, I trust in Your infinite mercy. God is my Father and so I, His
child, have every claim to His divine Heart; and the greater the darkness, the
more complete our trust should be.
377
Concerning Holy Confession. We should derive two kinds of profit from Holy
Confession:
1. We
come to confession to be healed;
2. We
come to be educated-like a small child, our soul has constant need of
education.
O my
Jesus, I understand these words to their very depths, and I know from my own
experience that, on its own strength, the soul will not go far; it will exert
itself greatly and will do nothing for the glory of God; it will err
continually, because our mind is darkened and does not know how to discern its
own affairs. I shall pay special attention to two things: firstly, I will
choose, in making my confession, that which humiliates me most, even if it be a
trifle, but something that costs me much, and for that reason I will tell it; secondly,
I will practice contrition, not only during confession, but during every
self-examination, and I will arouse within myself an act of perfect contrition,
especially when I am going to bed. One more word: a soul which sincerely wants
to advance in perfection must observe strictly the advice given by the
spiritual director. There is as much holiness as there is dependence.
395 [February] 15, 1935. A few days' visit at my parents' home [92]
to see my dying mother. When I learned that my
mother was seriously ill and near death, and that she had asked that I come
home, as she wanted to see me once more before dying, a host of emotions were
awakened in my heart. As a child who sincerely loves its mother, I wanted very
much to fulfill her wish. But I left this to God and resigned myself completely
to His will. Paying no heed to the ache in my heart, I followed God's will. On
the morning of my name day, February fifteen, Mother Superior gave me a second
letter from my family and granted me permission to go to my parents' home to
fulfill the wish and request of my dying mother. I began at once to make the
necessary preparations for the journey and left Vilnius in the evening. I
offered the whole night for my seriously ill mother, that God might grant her
the grace of losing none of the merits of her suffering.
406 After
a short while, I saw the little Jesus, who came out from the Host and rested in
my hands. This lasted for a moment; immense joy flooded my soul. The Child
Jesus had the same appearance as He had the time we entered the Chapel with
Mother Superior-my former Directress, Mary Joseph. The next day I was already
back in my beloved Vilnius.
424 In
the evening, I just about got into bed, and I fell asleep immediately. Though I
fell asleep quickly, I was awakened even more quickly. A little child came and
woke me up. The child seemed about a year old, and I was surprised it could
speak so well, as children of that age either do not speak or speak very
indistinctly The child was beautiful beyond words and resembled the Child
Jesus, and he said to me, Look at the sky. And when I looked at the sky
I saw the stars and the moon shining. Then the child asked me, Do you see
this moon and these stars? When I said yes, he spoke these words to me, These
stars are the souls of faithful Christians, and the moon is the souls of
religious. Do you see how great the difference is between the light of the moon
and the light of the stars? Such is the difference in heaven between the soul
of a religious and the soul of a faithful Christian. And he went on to say
that, True greatness is in loving God and in humility.
427 A
moment later, I again saw the child who had awakened me. It was of wondrous
beauty and repeated these words to me, True greatness of the soul is in
loving God and in humility. I asked the child, "How do you know
that true greatness of the soul is in loving God and in humility? Only
theologians know about such things and you haven't even learned the catechism.
So how do you know?" To this he answered, I know; I know all things. And
with that, He disappeared.
451 Once
after Holy Communion, I heard these words: You are Our dwelling place. At
that moment, I felt in my soul the presence of the Holy Trinity, the Father,
the Son and the Holy Spirit. I felt that I was the temple of God. I felt I was
a child of the Father. I cannot explain all this, but the spirit understands it
well. O infinite Goodness, how low You stoop to Your miserable creature!
481 Almost every feast of the Church gives me a deeper knowledge of God
and a special grace. That is why I prepare myself for each feast and unite
myself closely with the spirit of the Church. What a joy it is to be a faithful
child of the Church! Oh, how much I love Holy Church and all those who live in
it! I look upon them as living members of Christ, who is their Head. I burn
with love with those who love; I suffer with those who suffer, I am consumed
with sorrow at the sight of those who are cold and ungrateful; and I then try
to have such a love for God that it will make amends for those who do not love
Him, those who feed their Savior with ingratitude at its worst.
J.M.J.
Cracow, October 20, 1935.
Eight-day
Retreat.
492
Eternal God, Goodness itself, whose mercy is incomprehensible to every
intellect, whether human or angelic, help me, your feeble child, to do Your
holy will as You make it known to me. I desire nothing but to fulfill God's
desires. Lord, here are my soul and my body, my mind and my will, my heart and
all my love. Rule me according to Your eternal plans.
494 When I was about to go to the parlor to see Father Andrasz, I felt
frightened because the secret is binding only in the confessional. This was a
groundless fear. One word from Mother Superior set me at ease about it.
Meanwhile, when I entered the chapel, I heard these words in my soul: I want
you to be open and simple as a child with My representative just as you are
with Me; otherwise I will leave you and will not commune with you.
Truly, God gave me the great grace of complete confidence, and after the conversation, God granted me the grace of deep peace and light concerning these matters.
Truly, God gave me the great grace of complete confidence, and after the conversation, God granted me the grace of deep peace and light concerning these matters.
495 Jesus, Eternal Light, enlighten my mind, strengthen my will, inflame
my heart and be with me as You have promised, for without You I am nothing. You
know, Jesus, how weak lam. l do not need to tell You this, for You yourself
know perfectly well how wretched I am. It is in You that all my strength lies.
497 O Eternal Truth, Word Incarnate, who most
faithfully fulfilled Your Father's will, today I am becoming a martyr of Your
inspirations, since I cannot carry them out because I have no will of my own,
though interiorly I see Your will clearly. I submit in everything to the will
of my superiors and my confessor. I will follow Your will insofar as You will permit
me to do so through Your representative. O my Jesus, it cannot be helped, but I
give priority to the voice of the Church over the voice with which You speak to
me.
505 All my nothingness is drowned in the sea of Your mercy. With the
confidence of a child, I throw myself into Your arms, O Father of Mercy, to
make up for the unbelief of so many souls who are afraid to trust in You. Oh,
how very few souls really know You! How ardently I desire that the Feast of
Mercy be known by souls! Mercy is the crown of Your works; You provide for all
with the love of a most tender mother.
529 On
the evening of the last day [November 15] of the novena at Ostra Brama, after
the singing of the litany, one of the priests exposed the Blessed Sacrament in
the monstrance. When he placed it on the altar, I immediately saw the Infant
Jesus, stretching out His little arms, first of all toward His Mother, who at
that time had taken on a living appearance. When the Mother of God was speaking
to me, Jesus stretched out His tiny hands toward the congregation. The Blessed
Mother was telling me to accept all that God asked of me like a little child,
without questioning; otherwise it would not be pleasing to God. At that moment,
the Infant Jesus vanished, and the Mother of God was again lifeless, and Her
picture was the same as it had been before. But my soul was filled with great
joy and gladness, and I said to the Lord, "Do with me as You please; I am
ready for everything, but You, O Lord, must not abandon me even for a moment."
551 How great should each one's love for the Church be! As a good child
prays for the mother it loves, so also should every Christian soul pray for the
Church, its Mother. What then should be said of us religious who have
especially committed ourselves to praying for the Church? How great, then, is
our apostolate, hidden though it be. All our little daily nothings will be
placed at the feet of the Lord Jesus as a propitiatory offering for the world;
but in order that our offering may be pleasing to God, it must be pure. And for
it to be pure, the heart must be freed of all natural attachments, and all its
affections must be directed towards the Creator, loving all creatures in Him
and according to His will; and, acting thus, each with a zealous spirit will
bring joy to the Church.
566 One day, after Holy Communion, I suddenly saw the Infant Jesus
standing by my kneeler and holding on to it with His two little hands. Although
He was but a little Child, my soul was filled with awe and fear, for I see in
Him my Judge, my Lord, and my Creator, before whose holiness the Angels
tremble. At the same time, my soul was flooded with such unspeakable love that
I thought I would die under its influence. I now see that Jesus first
strengthens my soul and makes it capable of abiding with Him, for otherwise I
would not be able to bear what I experience at such a moment.
567 All
the sisters should respect the superior as the Lord Jesus himself, as I
mentioned when speaking about the vow of obedience. They should behave toward
her with childlike trust, and should never murmur or find fault with her
commands, as this is very displeasing to God. Let each be guided by a spirit of
faith in her relationship to superiors; let her ask with simplicity for all
that she needs. God forbid that it ever happen or be repeated that any of the
sisters would be a cause of sorrow or tears to the superior. Let each one know
that as the fourth commandment obliges a child to honor its parents, in like
manner is the religious bound to respect her superior. Only a bad religious
would take the liberty of judging her superior. Let the sisters be sincere with
the superior, telling her about everything and about their needs with childlike
simplicity.
The sisters will address the superior thus: "With your leave, Sister Superior." They shall never kiss her hand, but whenever they meet her in the corridor or enter her cell, they should say, "Praised be Jesus Christ," bowing their heads slightly.
They shall address each other as "Sister," adding the proper name. Their relationship toward the superior should be marked by a spirit of faith and not by sentimentality or flattery, as these are unworthy of a religious and would degrade her very much. A religious should be as free as a queen, and will be such only when she lives in the spirit of faith. We should obey and respect the superior, not because she is good, holy or prudent, but solely because she represents God, and by obeying her we are obeying God himself.
The sisters will address the superior thus: "With your leave, Sister Superior." They shall never kiss her hand, but whenever they meet her in the corridor or enter her cell, they should say, "Praised be Jesus Christ," bowing their heads slightly.
They shall address each other as "Sister," adding the proper name. Their relationship toward the superior should be marked by a spirit of faith and not by sentimentality or flattery, as these are unworthy of a religious and would degrade her very much. A religious should be as free as a queen, and will be such only when she lives in the spirit of faith. We should obey and respect the superior, not because she is good, holy or prudent, but solely because she represents God, and by obeying her we are obeying God himself.
589 Love casts out fear. Since I came to love God with my whole being
and with all the strength of my heart, fear has left me. Even if I were to hear
the most terrifying things about God's justice, I would not fear Him at all,
because I have come to know Him well. God is love, and His Spirit is peace. I see
now that my deeds which have flowed from love are more perfect than those which
I have done out of fear. I have placed my trust in God and fear nothing. I have
given myself over to His holy will; let Him do with me as He wishes, and I will
still love Him.
592 I
learned in the Heart of Jesus that in heaven itself there is a heaven to which
not all, but only chosen souls, have access. Incomprehensible is the happiness
in which the soul will be immersed. O my God, oh, that I could describe this,
even in some little degree. Souls are penetrated by His divinity and pass from
brightness to brightness, an unchanging light, but never monotonous, always new
though never changing. O Holy Trinity, make yourself known to souls!
593 O my Jesus, nothing is better for the soul than humiliations. In contempt is the secret of happiness, when the soul recognizes that, of itself, it is only wretchedness and nothingness, and that whatever it possesses of good is a gift of God. When the soul sees that everything is given it freely and that the only thing it has of itself is its own misery, this is what sustains it in a continual act of humble prostration before the majesty of God. And God, seeing the soul in such a disposition, pursues it with His graces. As the soul continues to immerse itself more deeply into the abyss of its nothingness and need, God uses His omnipotence to exalt it. If there is a truly happy soul upon earth, it can only be a truly humble soul. At first, one's self-love suffers greatly on this account, but after a soul has struggled courageously, God grants it much light by which it sees how wretched and full of deception everything is. God alone is in its heart. A humble soul does not trust itself, but places all its confidence in God. God defends the humble soul and lets Himself into its secrets, and the soul abides in unsurpassable happiness which no one can comprehend.
593 O my Jesus, nothing is better for the soul than humiliations. In contempt is the secret of happiness, when the soul recognizes that, of itself, it is only wretchedness and nothingness, and that whatever it possesses of good is a gift of God. When the soul sees that everything is given it freely and that the only thing it has of itself is its own misery, this is what sustains it in a continual act of humble prostration before the majesty of God. And God, seeing the soul in such a disposition, pursues it with His graces. As the soul continues to immerse itself more deeply into the abyss of its nothingness and need, God uses His omnipotence to exalt it. If there is a truly happy soul upon earth, it can only be a truly humble soul. At first, one's self-love suffers greatly on this account, but after a soul has struggled courageously, God grants it much light by which it sees how wretched and full of deception everything is. God alone is in its heart. A humble soul does not trust itself, but places all its confidence in God. God defends the humble soul and lets Himself into its secrets, and the soul abides in unsurpassable happiness which no one can comprehend.
603
January 29, 1936. In the evening, when I was in my cell, I suddenly saw a great
light and a dark gray cross high up within the light. Suddenly, I found myself
caught up close to the cross. I gazed at it intently, but could not understand
anything, and so I prayed, asking what it could mean. At that moment I saw the
Lord Jesus, and the cross disappeared. The Lord Jesus was sitting in a great
light, and His legs, up to the knees, were drowned in the light so that I could
not see them. Jesus bent toward me, looked at me kindly and spoke to me about
the will of the Heavenly Father. He told me that the most perfect and holy soul
is the one that does the will of the Father, but there are not many such, and
that He looks with special love upon the soul who lives His will. And Jesus
told me that I was doing the will of God perfectly...and for this reason I
am uniting Myself with you and communing with you in a special and intimate
way.
God embraces with His incomprehensible love the soul who lives by His will. I understood how much God loves us, how simple He is, though incomprehensible, and how easy it is to commune with Him, despite His great majesty. With no one do I feel as free and as much at ease as with Him. Even a mother and her truly loving child do not understand each other so well as God and I do. When I was in that state of communion with God, I saw two particular persons, and their sad interior condition was revealed to me. They were in a sorrowful state, but I trust that they, too, will glorify the mercy of God.
God embraces with His incomprehensible love the soul who lives by His will. I understood how much God loves us, how simple He is, though incomprehensible, and how easy it is to commune with Him, despite His great majesty. With no one do I feel as free and as much at ease as with Him. Even a mother and her truly loving child do not understand each other so well as God and I do. When I was in that state of communion with God, I saw two particular persons, and their sad interior condition was revealed to me. They were in a sorrowful state, but I trust that they, too, will glorify the mercy of God.
606 My Jesus, despite Your graces, I see and feel all my misery. I begin
my day with battle and end it with battle. As soon as I conquer one obstacle,
ten more appear to take its place. But I am not worried, because I know that
this is the time of struggle, not peace. When the burden of the battle becomes
too much for me, I throw myself like a child into the arms of the heavenly
Father and trust I will not perish. O my Jesus, how prone I am to evil, and
this forces me to be constantly vigilant. But I do not lose heart. I trust
God's grace, which abounds in the worst misery.
626 In the evening, during Benediction, my soul was for some time in
communion with God the Father. I felt I was in His hand like a little child,
and I heard these words in my soul: Do not fear anything, My daughter; all
the adversaries will be shattered at My feet. At these words, a deep peace
and a great interior calm entered my soul.
628 On the evening of the last day before my departure from Vilnius, an
elderly sister [131] revealed the
condition of her soul to me. She said that she had already been suffering
interiorly for several years, that it seemed to her that all her confessions
had been bad, and that she had doubts as to whether the Lord Jesus had forgiven
her. I asked her if she had ever told her confessor about this. She answered
that she had spoken many times about this to her confessors and... "the
confessors are always telling me to be at peace, but still I suffer very much,
and nothing brings me relief, and it constantly seems to me that God has not
forgiven me." I answered, "You should obey your confessor, Sister,
and be fully at peace, because this is certainly a temptation."
But she entreated me with tears in her eyes to ask Jesus if He had forgiven her and whether her confessions had been good or not. I answered forcefully, "Ask Him yourself, Sister, if you don't believe your confessors!" But she clutched my hand and did not want to let me go until I gave her an answer, and she kept asking me to pray for her and to let her know what Jesus would tell me about her. Crying bitterly, she would not let me go and said to me, "I know that the Lord Jesus speaks to you, Sister." Since she was clutching my hand and I could not wrench myself away, I promised her I would pray for her. In the evening, during Benediction, I heard these words in my soul: Tell her that her disbelief wounds My heart more than the sins she committed. When I told her this, she began to cry like a child, and great joy entered her soul. I understood that God wanted to console this soul through me. Even though it cost me a good deal, I fulfilled God's wish.
But she entreated me with tears in her eyes to ask Jesus if He had forgiven her and whether her confessions had been good or not. I answered forcefully, "Ask Him yourself, Sister, if you don't believe your confessors!" But she clutched my hand and did not want to let me go until I gave her an answer, and she kept asking me to pray for her and to let her know what Jesus would tell me about her. Crying bitterly, she would not let me go and said to me, "I know that the Lord Jesus speaks to you, Sister." Since she was clutching my hand and I could not wrench myself away, I promised her I would pray for her. In the evening, during Benediction, I heard these words in my soul: Tell her that her disbelief wounds My heart more than the sins she committed. When I told her this, she began to cry like a child, and great joy entered her soul. I understood that God wanted to console this soul through me. Even though it cost me a good deal, I fulfilled God's wish.
629 When I entered the chapel for a moment that same evening, to thank
God for all the graces He had bestowed on me in this house, suddenly God's
presence enveloped me. I felt like a child in the hands of the best of fathers,
and I heard these words: Do not fear anything. I am always with you. His
love penetrated my whole being. I felt I was entering into such close intimacy
with Him that I cannot find words to express it.
677 During a Mass celebrated by Father Andrasz, a moment before the
Elevation, God's presence pervaded my soul, which was drawn to the altar. Then
I saw the Mother of God with the Infant Jesus. The Infant Jesus was holding
onto the hand of Our Lady. A moment later, the Infant Jesus ran with joy to the
center of the altar, and the Mother of God said to me, See with what
assurance I entrust Jesus into his hands. In the same way, you are to entrust
your soul and be like a child to him.
-After these words, my soul was filled with unusual trust. The Mother of God was clothed in a white dress, strangely white, transparent; on Her shoulders She had a transparent blue; that is, a blue-like mantle; with uncovered head [and] flowing hair, She was exquisite, and inconceivably beautiful. She was looking at Father with great tenderness, but after a moment, He broke up this beautiful Child, and living blood flowed forth. Father bent forward and received the true and living Jesus into himself. Had he eaten Him? I do not know how this took place. Jesus, Jesus, I cannot keep up with You, for in an instant, You become incomprehensible to me.
-After these words, my soul was filled with unusual trust. The Mother of God was clothed in a white dress, strangely white, transparent; on Her shoulders She had a transparent blue; that is, a blue-like mantle; with uncovered head [and] flowing hair, She was exquisite, and inconceivably beautiful. She was looking at Father with great tenderness, but after a moment, He broke up this beautiful Child, and living blood flowed forth. Father bent forward and received the true and living Jesus into himself. Had he eaten Him? I do not know how this took place. Jesus, Jesus, I cannot keep up with You, for in an instant, You become incomprehensible to me.
709 October
3, 1936. During the rosary today, I suddenly saw a ciborium with the Blessed
Sacrament. The ciborium was uncovered and quite filled with hosts. From the
ciborium came a voice: These hosts have been received by souls converted
through your prayer and suffering. At this point, I felt God's
presence as a child would; I felt strangely like a child.
722 + Today, I heard these words: You see how weak you are, so when
shall I be able to count on you? I answered, "Jesus, be always with
me, for I am Your little child. Jesus, You know what little children do."
786
November 30, [1936]. During Vespers today, an unusual pain pierced my soul. I
see that, in every respect, this work is beyond my strength. I am a little
child before the immensity of the task, and it is only at the Lord's clear
command that I am setting about to carry it out. On the other hand, even these
great graces are a burden for me, and I am barely able to carry them. I see my
superiors' disbelief and doubts of all kinds and, for this reason, their
apprehensive behavior towards me. My Jesus, I see that even such great graces
can be [a source of] suffering. And yet, it is so; not only may they be a cause
of suffering, but they must be such, as a sign of God's action. I understand
well that if God himself did not strengthen the soul in these various ordeals,
the soul would not be able to master the situation. Thus God himself is its shield.
As I
continued Vespers, meditating on this mixture of suffering and grace, I heard
the voice of Our Lady: Know, My daughter, that although I was raised to the
dignity of Mother of God, seven swords of pain pierced My heart. Don't
do anything to defend yourself, bear everything with humility; God
himself will defend you.
December 1,
[1936]. One-day retreat.
795 I
have accepted the favor of this treatment, but I am fully resigned to the will
of God. Let God do with me as He pleases. I desire nothing but the fulfillment
of His holy will. I am uniting myself with the Mother of God, and I am leaving
Nazareth and going to Bethlehem. I will spend Christmas there among strangers,
but with Jesus, Mary and Joseph, because such is the will of God. I am striving
to do the will of God in all things. I do not desire a return to health more
than death. I entrust myself completely to His infinite mercy and, as a little
child, I am living in the greatest peace. I am trying only to make my love for
Him deeper and purer, to be a delight to His divine glance...
895
January 23, [1937]. I did not feel like writing today. Then I heard a voice in
my soul:My daughter, you do not live for yourself but for souls; write for
their benefit. You know that My will as to your writing has been confirmed many
times by your confessors. You know what is pleasing to Me, and if you have any
doubts about what I am saying, you also know whom you are to ask. I grant him
light to pronounce judgment on my case. My eye watches over him. My daughter,
you are to be like a child towards him, full of simplicity and candor. Put his
judgment above all My demands. He will guide you according to My will. If he
doesn't allow you to carry out My demands, be at peace; I will not judge you,
but the matter will remain between Me and him. You are to be obedient.
898 O my
Jesus, You are giving me back my health and life; give me also strength for
battle, because I am unable to do anything without You. Give me strength, for
You can do all things. You see that I am a frail child, and what can I do? I
know the full power of Your mercy, and I trust that You will give me everything
Your feeble child needs. .
921
February 6, [1937]. Today, the Lord said to me, My daughter, I am told that
there is much simplicity in you, so why do you not tell Me about everything
that concerns you, even the smallest details? Tell Me about everything, and
know that this will give Me great joy. I answered, "But You know about
everything, Lord." And Jesus replied to me, Yes, I do know; but you
should not excuse yourself with the fact that I know, but with childlike
simplicity talk to Me about everything, for My ears and heart are inclined
towards you, and your words are dear to Me.
922 +
When I began this big novena for three intentions, I saw a tiny insect on the
ground and thought: how did it get here in the middle of winter? Then I heard
the following words in my soul: You see, I am thinking of it and sustaining
it, and what is it compared to you? Why was your soul fearful for a moment? I
apologized to the Lord for that moment. Jesus wants me to always be a child and
to leave all care to Him, and to submit blindly to His holy will. He took
everything upon Himself.
944 +
There are moments when I mistrust myself, when I feel my own weakness and
wretchedness in the most profound depths of my own being, and I have noticed
that I can endure such moments only by trusting in the infinite mercy of God.
Patience, prayer and silence-these are what give strength to the soul. There
are moments when one should be silent, and when it would be inappropriate to
talk with creatures; these are the moments when one is dissatisfied with
oneself, and when the soul feels as weak as a little child. Then the soul
clings to God with all its might. At such times, I live solely by faith, and
when I feel strengthened by God's grace, then I am more courageous in speaking
and communicating with my neighbors.
968 Since
I have placed you in this priest's special care, you are thus exempted from
giving a detailed account to your superiors concerning My relationship with
you. In all other matters, be as a child with your superiors, but whatever I do
in the depths of your soul is to be told, with all frankness, only to the
priests.
1031 March
22, 1937. As I was talking, today, to a certain person, I recognized that she
was suffering greatly in spirit, although exteriorly she pretended that she was
very happy and was not suffering at all. I felt inspired to tell her that what
was troubling her was a temptation. When I disclosed to her what was torturing
her, she burst into tears and told me that she had come to see me precisely to
speak to me, because she felt that it would bring her relief. The suffering was
of such a kind that the soul was being attracted by God's grace on the one hand
and by the world on the other. She was going through a terrible struggle that
brought her to the point of weeping like a little child. But she went away
soothed and set at peace.
1033 + When I see that the burden is beyond my strength, I do not
consider or analyze it or probe into it, but I run like a child to the Heart of
Jesus and say only one word to Him: "You can do all things." And then
I keep silent, because I know that Jesus himself will intervene in the matter,
and as for me, instead of tormenting myself, I use that time to love Him.
1097
Since that time, I have been living under the virginal ', cloak of the Mother
of God. She has been guarding me and instructing me. I am quite at peace, close
to Her Immaculate Heart. Because I am so weak and inexperienced, I nestle like
a little child close to Her heart.
1109 +
30. This is the day for the renewal of vows.
Immediately upon my awakening, God's presence enveloped me, and I felt I was a child of God. Divine love was poured into my soul, and God gave me to see how everything depended on His will. He spoke these words to me: I want to grant a complete pardon to the souls that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion on the Feast of My mercy. Then He said to me, My daughter, fear nothing. I am always with you, even if it seems to you that I am not. Your humility draws Me down from My lofty throne, and I unite myself closely with you.
Immediately upon my awakening, God's presence enveloped me, and I felt I was a child of God. Divine love was poured into my soul, and God gave me to see how everything depended on His will. He spoke these words to me: I want to grant a complete pardon to the souls that will go to Confession and receive Holy Communion on the Feast of My mercy. Then He said to me, My daughter, fear nothing. I am always with you, even if it seems to you that I am not. Your humility draws Me down from My lofty throne, and I unite myself closely with you.
1153 June
23, [1937]. As I was praying before the Most Blessed Sacrament, my physical
sufferings ceased suddenly, and I heard this voice in my soul: You see, I
can give you everything in one moment. I am not constrained by any law.
June 24.
After Holy Communion, I heard these words: Know, My daughter, that in one
moment I can give you everything that is needed for the fulfillment of
this task. After these words, an extraordinary light remained
in my soul, and all God's demands seemed to me to be so simple that even
a little child could carry them out.
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I- 2, 27, 55, 102, 116, 148,
184, 209, 219)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-220, 227-230, 240, 242,
244-245, 260)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-260, 264, 274-275,
282-284, 290, 294)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-295-298, 306, 315, 357,
497, 377, 395)
(Diary of
Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-406, 424, 427, 451, 481, 492, 494-495)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-497)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-529, 551, 566-567, 589,
592-593, 603)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-606, 626, 628-629, 677,
709, 722, 786)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-795, 895, 898, 921-922,
944, 968)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1031, 1033, 1097, 1109,
1153)
http://www.saint-faustina.com/Diary/DMIMS10.shtml
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