What´s in a Name?
Solemnity of the Nativity of John the Baptist
Father Edward McIlmail, LC
Luke
1:57-66, 80
When the time arrived for Elizabeth to have her child she gave birth to a son. Her neighbors and relatives heard that the Lord had shown his great mercy toward her, and they rejoiced with her. When they came on the eighth day to circumcise the child, they were going to call him Zechariah after his father, but his mother said in reply, "No. He will be called John." But they answered her, "There is no one among your relatives who has this name." So they made signs, asking his father what he wished him to be called. He asked for a tablet and wrote, "John is his name," and all were amazed. Immediately his mouth was opened, his tongue freed, and he spoke blessing God. Then fear came upon all their neighbors, and all these matters were discussed throughout the hill country of Judea. All who heard these things took them to heart, saying, "What, then, will this child be?" For surely the hand of the Lord was with him. The child grew and became strong in spirit, and he was in the desert until the day of his manifestation to Israel.
When the time arrived for Elizabeth to have her child she gave birth to a son. Her neighbors and relatives heard that the Lord had shown his great mercy toward her, and they rejoiced with her. When they came on the eighth day to circumcise the child, they were going to call him Zechariah after his father, but his mother said in reply, "No. He will be called John." But they answered her, "There is no one among your relatives who has this name." So they made signs, asking his father what he wished him to be called. He asked for a tablet and wrote, "John is his name," and all were amazed. Immediately his mouth was opened, his tongue freed, and he spoke blessing God. Then fear came upon all their neighbors, and all these matters were discussed throughout the hill country of Judea. All who heard these things took them to heart, saying, "What, then, will this child be?" For surely the hand of the Lord was with him. The child grew and became strong in spirit, and he was in the desert until the day of his manifestation to Israel.
Introductory Prayer: Lord, I make this effort at prayer for the sake of my soul and the
souls of my loved ones. I believe that You died for us and want us to be with
You forever in heaven.
Petition: Grant me new respect, Lord, for parents.
1. Bundle of Joy: The arrival of a new baby
has been a source of joy throughout the ages. Babies are God´s way of saying
the world should go on. Each new child reflects a facet of the infinite beauty
and mystery of God. And by teaching us patience and selflessness, the little
ones help us grow in holiness. In their childlike simplicity they teach us to
remain simple. Their neediness can, and should, soften our hearts. They don´t
even have to be our own children; we can feel an obligation to help all kids,
since their lives enrich all of us. What have I done lately to help the little
ones, born and unborn? Is there a crisis-pregnancy center that could use help?
Have I spoken well of parents who are open to large families?
2. God´s Choice: For the ancient Jews a
name captured, even defined, a person´s identity. So for Elizabeth to name her
son "John" was significant. It showed her recognition of God´s great
plan for the child. John was in the Almighty´s special care from the start.
Even today, each and every child is loved by God and has a destiny in the
heavenly Father´s plan. Each has a vocation, a calling, in the Church. Do I
appreciate the role that little ones have in God´s plans? Do I respect their
dignity? Or do I try to impose my prejudices on them? They are tomorrow´s
adults. How will I want them to remember my example?
3. Loosened Lips: Zechariah had doubted God and was struck mute. He regains his speech only after publicly accepting God´s plan and allowing his newborn son to take the name John. We, too, might have a bit of Zechariah in us. We resist God, only to hit a dead end. Bad friendships, habits of serious sin, rising despair – all of these can eat away at us. Yet, repentance is slow to come. Why? "We think that evil is basically good," said Pope Benedict XVI (December 8, 2005). "We think that we need it, at least a little, in order to experience the fullness of being. … If we look, however, at the world that surrounds us we can see that this is not so; in other words, that evil is always poisonous, does not uplift human beings, but degrades and humiliates them." Am I resisting God´s plans?
Conversation with Christ: Lord, You have put family members and other loved ones in my life for a reason. I´m to help them get to heaven, and they are to help me do the same. Remind me of this truth, and help me in a special way not to interfere with the plans You have for the children in my life.
3. Loosened Lips: Zechariah had doubted God and was struck mute. He regains his speech only after publicly accepting God´s plan and allowing his newborn son to take the name John. We, too, might have a bit of Zechariah in us. We resist God, only to hit a dead end. Bad friendships, habits of serious sin, rising despair – all of these can eat away at us. Yet, repentance is slow to come. Why? "We think that evil is basically good," said Pope Benedict XVI (December 8, 2005). "We think that we need it, at least a little, in order to experience the fullness of being. … If we look, however, at the world that surrounds us we can see that this is not so; in other words, that evil is always poisonous, does not uplift human beings, but degrades and humiliates them." Am I resisting God´s plans?
Conversation with Christ: Lord, You have put family members and other loved ones in my life for a reason. I´m to help them get to heaven, and they are to help me do the same. Remind me of this truth, and help me in a special way not to interfere with the plans You have for the children in my life.
Resolution: I will pray a decade of the rosary that all my family members reach heaven.
Excerpts
from the DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
6 I am to write [3]
down the encounters of my soul with You, O God, at the moments of Your special
visitations. I am to write about You, O Incomprehensible in mercy towards my poor
soul. Your holy will is the life of my soul. I have received this order through
him who is for me Your representative here on earth, who interprets Your holy
Will to me. Jesus, You see how difficult it is for me to write, how unable I am
to put down clearly what I experience in my soul. O God, can a pen write down
that for which many a time there are no words? But You give the order to write,
O God; that is enough for me.
18 However, after three weeks I became aware that there is so very
little time here for prayer, and of many other things which spoke to my soul in
favor of entering a religious community of a stricter observance. This thought
took a firm hold of my soul, but the will of God was not in it. Still, the
thought, or rather the temptation, was growing stronger and stronger to the
point where I decided one day to announce my departure to Mother Superior and
definitely to leave [the convent]. But God arranged the circumstances in such a
way that I could not get to the Mother Superior [Michael]. I stepped into the
little chapel [7] before going to bed, and I asked Jesus for light in
this matter. But I received nothing in my soul except a strange unrest which I
did not understand. But, in spite of everything, I made up my mind to approach
Mother Superior the next morning right after Mass and tell her of my decision.
19 I came to my cell. The sisters were already in bed - the lights were out. I entered the cell full of anguish and discontent; I did not know what to do with myself. I threw myself headlong on the ground and began to pray fervently that I might come to know the will of God. There is silence everywhere as in the tabernacle. All the sisters are resting like white hosts enclosed in Jesus’ chalice. It is only from my cell that God can hear the moaning of a soul. I did not know that one was not allowed to pray in the cell after nine without permission. [8]
19 I came to my cell. The sisters were already in bed - the lights were out. I entered the cell full of anguish and discontent; I did not know what to do with myself. I threw myself headlong on the ground and began to pray fervently that I might come to know the will of God. There is silence everywhere as in the tabernacle. All the sisters are resting like white hosts enclosed in Jesus’ chalice. It is only from my cell that God can hear the moaning of a soul. I did not know that one was not allowed to pray in the cell after nine without permission. [8]
497 O Eternal Truth,
Word Incarnate, who most faithfully fulfilled Your Father's will, today I am
becoming a martyr of Your inspirations, since I cannot carry them out because I
have no will of my own, though interiorly I see Your will clearly. I submit in
everything to the will of my superiors and my confessor. I will follow Your
will insofar as You will permit me to do so through Your representative. O my
Jesus, it cannot be helped, but I give priority to the voice of the Church over
the voice with which You speak to me.
678 The essence of the virtues is the will of
God. He who does the will of God faithfully, practices all the virtues. In all
the events and circumstances of my life, I adore and bless the holy will of
God. The holy will of God is the object of my love. In the most secret depths
of my soul, I live according to His will. I act exteriorly according to what I
recognize inwardly as the will of God. Sweeter to me are the torments,
sufferings, persecutions and all manner of adversities by divine will than
popularity, praise and esteem by my own will.
724 On the eve of the
retreat, I started to pray that the Lord Jesus might give me just a little
health so that I could take part in the retreat, because I was feeling so ill
that I thought perhaps it might be my last. However, as soon as I had started
praying I felt a strange dissatisfaction. I interrupted the prayer of
supplication and began to thank the Lord for everything He sends me, submitting
myself completely to His holy will. Then I felt profound peace of soul. +
Faithful submission to the will of God, always and everywhere, in all events
and circumstances of life, gives great glory to God. Such submission to the
will of God carries more weight with Him than long fasts, mortifications and
the most severe penances. Oh, how great is the reward for one act of loving
submission to the will of God! As I write, my soul is enraptured at the thought
of how much God loves it and of the peace that my soul already enjoys, here on
earth.
742 My daughter, if I
demand through you that people revere My mercy, you should be the first to
distinguish yourself by this confidence in My mercy. I demand from you deeds of
mercy, which are to arise out of love for Me. You are to show mercy to your
neighbors always and everywhere. You must not shrink from this or try to excuse
or absolve yourself from it.
I am giving you three ways of exercising mercy toward your neighbor: the first-by deed, the second-by word, the third-by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for Me. By this means a soul glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy. Yes, the first Sunday after Easter is the Feast of Mercy, but there must also be acts of mercy, and I demand the worship of My mercy through the solemn celebration of the Feast and through the veneration of the image which is painted. By means of this image I shall grant many graces to souls. It is to be a reminder of the demands of My mercy, because even the strongest faith is of no avail without works. O my Jesus, You yourself must help me in everything, because You see how very little I am, and so I depend solely on Your goodness, O God.
I am giving you three ways of exercising mercy toward your neighbor: the first-by deed, the second-by word, the third-by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for Me. By this means a soul glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy. Yes, the first Sunday after Easter is the Feast of Mercy, but there must also be acts of mercy, and I demand the worship of My mercy through the solemn celebration of the Feast and through the veneration of the image which is painted. By means of this image I shall grant many graces to souls. It is to be a reminder of the demands of My mercy, because even the strongest faith is of no avail without works. O my Jesus, You yourself must help me in everything, because You see how very little I am, and so I depend solely on Your goodness, O God.
954 Today after Holy Communion, the Lord told me, My daughter, My
delight is to unite myself with you. It is when you submit yourself to My will
that you give Me the greatest glory and draw down upon yourself a sea of
blessings. I would not take such special delight in you if you were not living
by my will. O my sweet Guest, I am prepared for all sacrifices for Your
sake, but You know that I am weakness itself. Nevertheless, with You I can do
all things. O my Jesus, I beseech You, be with me at each instant.
1180 June [July] 15, 1937. Once, I learned that I was to be transferred
to another house. My knowledge of this was purely interior. At the same time, I
heard a voice in my soul: Do not be afraid, My daughter; it is My will that
you should remain here. Human plans will be thwarted, since they must conform
to My will.
1181 When I was close to
the Lord, He said to me, Why are you afraid to begin the work which I have
commanded you to carry out? I answered, "Why do You leave me on my own
at such times, Jesus, and why do I not feel Your presence?" My
daughter, even though you do not perceive Me in the most secret depths of your
heart, you still cannot say that I am not there. I only remove from you the
awareness of My presence, and that should not be an obstacle to the carrying
out of My will. I do this to achieve My unfathomable ends, which you will know
of later on.
My daughter, know without doubt, and once and for all, that only mortal sin drives Me out of a soul, and nothing else.
1182 + Today the Lord said to me, My daughter, My pleasure and delight, nothing will stop Me from granting you graces. Your misery does not hinder My mercy. My daughter, write that the greater the misery of a soul, the greater its right to My mercy; [urge] all souls to trust in the unfathomable abyss of My mercy, because I want to save them all. On the cross, the fountain of My mercy was opened wide by the lance for all souls-no one have I excluded!
1183 O Jesus, I want to live in the present moment, to live as if this were the last day of my life. I want to use every moment scrupulously for the greater glory of God, to use every circumstance for the benefit of my soul. I want to look upon everything, from the point of view that nothing happens without the will of God.
My daughter, know without doubt, and once and for all, that only mortal sin drives Me out of a soul, and nothing else.
1182 + Today the Lord said to me, My daughter, My pleasure and delight, nothing will stop Me from granting you graces. Your misery does not hinder My mercy. My daughter, write that the greater the misery of a soul, the greater its right to My mercy; [urge] all souls to trust in the unfathomable abyss of My mercy, because I want to save them all. On the cross, the fountain of My mercy was opened wide by the lance for all souls-no one have I excluded!
1183 O Jesus, I want to live in the present moment, to live as if this were the last day of my life. I want to use every moment scrupulously for the greater glory of God, to use every circumstance for the benefit of my soul. I want to look upon everything, from the point of view that nothing happens without the will of God.
1184 On an earlier
occasion.
In the evening, I saw the Lord Jesus upon the cross. From His hands, feet and side, the Most Sacred Blood was flowing. After some time, Jesus said to me, All this is for the salvation of souls. Consider well, My daughter, what you are doing for their salvation. I answered, "Jesus, when I look at Your suffering, I see that I am doing next to nothing for the salvation of souls." And the Lord said to me, Know, My daughter, that your silent day-to-day martyrdom in complete submission to My will ushers many souls into heaven. And when it seems to you that your suffering exceeds your strength, contemplate My wounds, and you will rise above human scorn and judgment. Meditation on My Passion will help you rise above all things. I understood many things I had been unable to comprehend before.
In the evening, I saw the Lord Jesus upon the cross. From His hands, feet and side, the Most Sacred Blood was flowing. After some time, Jesus said to me, All this is for the salvation of souls. Consider well, My daughter, what you are doing for their salvation. I answered, "Jesus, when I look at Your suffering, I see that I am doing next to nothing for the salvation of souls." And the Lord said to me, Know, My daughter, that your silent day-to-day martyrdom in complete submission to My will ushers many souls into heaven. And when it seems to you that your suffering exceeds your strength, contemplate My wounds, and you will rise above human scorn and judgment. Meditation on My Passion will help you rise above all things. I understood many things I had been unable to comprehend before.
1199 [July] 29. I am to
leave for Rabka today. I went into the chapel and asked the Lord Jesus for a
safe journey. But within my soul there was silence and darkness. I felt I was
all alone and had no one [to turn to]. I asked Jesus to be with me. Then I felt
a tiny ray of light in my soul as a sign that Jesus was with me but, after this
grace, the darkness and shadows in my soul increased. Then I said, "Your
will be done, for everything is possible to You." When I was on the train
and gazed through the window at the beautiful countryside and the mountains,
the torments of my soul grew even greater. As the sisters welcomed me and began
to surround me with their warmth, my sufferings redoubled.
1200 I would have like to hide and rest for a while in solitude, in a word, to be alone. At such moments, no creature is capable of giving me comfort, and even if I had wanted to say something about myself, I would have experienced new anguish. Therefore, I have kept silent at such moments and submitted myself, in silence, to the will of God-and that has given me relief. I demand nothing from creatures and communicate with them only in so far as is necessary. I will not take them into my confidence unless this is for the greater glory of God. My communing is with the angels [cf. Mt. 18:10; Ex. 23:20].
1200 I would have like to hide and rest for a while in solitude, in a word, to be alone. At such moments, no creature is capable of giving me comfort, and even if I had wanted to say something about myself, I would have experienced new anguish. Therefore, I have kept silent at such moments and submitted myself, in silence, to the will of God-and that has given me relief. I demand nothing from creatures and communicate with them only in so far as is necessary. I will not take them into my confidence unless this is for the greater glory of God. My communing is with the angels [cf. Mt. 18:10; Ex. 23:20].
1202 I could not even go
to Holy Mass or receive Holy Communion today but, amidst the sufferings of body
and soul, I kept on repeating, "May the Lord's will be done. I know that
Your bounty is without limit." Then 1 heard an angel who sang out my whole
life history and everything it comprised. I was surprised, but also
strengthened.
1204 A retreat of
suffering. O Jesus, in these days of suffering, I am not capable of any kind of
prayer. The oppression of my body and soul has increased. O my Jesus, You do
see that Your child is on the decline. I am not forcing myself further, but
simply submitting my will to the will of Jesus. O Jesus, You are always Jesus
to me.
1205 When I went to
confession, I did not even know how to confess. However, the priest [probably
Father Casimir Ratkiewicz [205]]
recognized the condition of my soul at once and said to me, "Despite
everything, you are on the way to salvation; you are on the right path, but God
may leave your soul in this darkness and obscurity until death, and the former
light may never return. But in all things abandon yourself to the will of God."
1207 August 10. Today I
am returning to Cracow, in the company of one of the sisters. My soul is
shrouded in suffering. I am continually uniting myself to Him by an act of the
will. He is my power and strength.
1208 May You be blessed,
O God, for everything You send me. Nothing under the sun happens without Your
will. I cannot penetrate Your secrets with regard to myself, but I press my
lips to the chalice You offer me.
1237 O Jesus, what
darkness is enveloping me and what nothingness is penetrating me. But, my
Jesus, do not leave me alone; grant me the grace of faithfulness. Although I
cannot penetrate the mystery of God's visitation, it is in my power to say:
Your will be done.
1239 O living Host, O
hidden Jesus. You see the condition of my soul. Of myself, I am unable to utter
Your Holy Name. I cannot bring forth from my heart the fire of love but,
kneeling at Your feet, I cast upon the Tabernacle the gaze of my soul, a gaze
of faithfulness. As for You, You are ever the same, while within my soul a change
takes place. I trust that the time will come when You will unveil Your
countenance, and Your child will again see Your sweet face. I am astonished,
Jesus, that You can hide yourself from me for so long and that You can restrain
the enormous love You have for me. In the dwelling of my heart, I am listening
and waiting for Your coming, O only Treasure of my heart!
1241 + 0 my Jesus, when
someone is unkind and unpleasant toward us, it is difficult enough to bear this
kind of suffering. But this is very little in comparison to a suffering which I
cannot bear; namely, that which I experience when someone exhibits kindness
towards me and then lays snares at my feet at every step I take. What great
will power is necessary to love such a soul for God's sake. Many a time one has
to be heroic in loving such a soul as God demands. If contact with that person
were infrequent, it would be easier to endure, but when one lives in close
contact with the person and experiences this at each step, this demands a very great
effort.
1243 "These times
of dryness and stark awareness of one's wretchedness, which God has permitted,
allow the soul to know how little it can do by itself. They will teach you how
much you should appreciate God's graces. Secondly, faithfulness in all
exercises and duties, faithfulness in everything, just as in times of joy.
Thirdly, as regards the matters in question, be absolutely obedient to the
Archbishop [Jalbrzykowski] although, from time to time, the matter can be
brought to his attention, but peacefully. Sometimes, a little bitter truth is
necessary."
At the end of the conversation, I asked the priest to allow me to commune with Jesus as I had done formerly. He answered, "I cannot give orders to the Lord Jesus, but if He himself draws you to himself you may follow the attraction. However, always remember to show Him great reverence, for the Lord is great indeed. If you are truly seeking God's will in all this and desire to fulfill it, you can be at peace; the Lord will not allow any sort of error. As to the mortifications and sufferings, you will give me an account next time of how you carry them out. Place yourself in the hands of the Most Holy Mother."
At the end of the conversation, I asked the priest to allow me to commune with Jesus as I had done formerly. He answered, "I cannot give orders to the Lord Jesus, but if He himself draws you to himself you may follow the attraction. However, always remember to show Him great reverence, for the Lord is great indeed. If you are truly seeking God's will in all this and desire to fulfill it, you can be at peace; the Lord will not allow any sort of error. As to the mortifications and sufferings, you will give me an account next time of how you carry them out. Place yourself in the hands of the Most Holy Mother."
1244 August 15, 1937.
During meditation, God's presence pervaded me keenly, and I was aware of the
Virgin Mary's joy at the moment of Her Assumption. Towards the end of the
ceremony carried out in honor of the Mother of God, I saw the Virgin Mary, and
She said to me, Oh, how very pleased I am with the homage of your love! And at
that moment She covered all the sisters of our Congregation with Her mantle.
With Her right hand, She clasped Mother General Michael to herself, and with
Her left hand She did so to me, while all the sisters were at Her feet, covered
with Her mantle. Then the Mother of God said, Everyone who perseveres
zealously till death in My Congregation will be spared the fire of purgatory,
and I desire that each one distinguish herself by the following virtues:
humility and meekness; chastity and love of God and neighbor; compassion and
mercy. After these words, the whole Congregation disappeared from my sight,
and I remained alone with the Most Holy Mother who instructed me about the will
of God and how to apply it to my life, submitting completely to His most holy
decrees. It is impossible for one to please God without obeying His holy will. My
daughter, I strongly recommend that you faithfully fulfill all God's wishes,
for that is most pleasing in His holy eyes. I very much desire that you
distinguish yourself in this faithfulness in accomplishing God's will. Put the
will of God before all sacrifices and holocausts. While the heavenly Mother
was talking to me, a deep understanding of this will of God was entering my soul.
1255 "As concerns
yourself, Sister, it is good that you are remaining in a state of holy
indifference in everything that pertains to the will of God, and that you are
better maintaining a state of equilibrium. Please do your best to keep this
equanimity. Now, as regards all these matters, you are to depend exclusively on
Father Andrasz; I am in complete agreement with him. Do nothing on your own,
Sister, but in all matters take counsel from your spiritual director. I beg you
to keep your levelheadedness and as great a calm as possible.One more thing-I
am having printed the chaplet which is to be on the back of the image, as well
as the invocations that resemble a litany; these too will be placed on the
back. Another large image has also been printed, and with it a few pages which
contain the Novena to The Divine Mercy. [208] Pray,
Sister, that this be approved."
1256 [August] 30.
Reverend Father Sopocko left this morning. When I was steeped in a prayer of
thanksgiving for the great grace that I had received from God; namely, that of
seeing Father, I became united in a special way with the Lord who said to me,
He is a priest after My own Heart; his efforts are pleasing to Me. You see, My
daughter, that My will must be done and that which I had promised you, I shall
do. Through him I spread comfort to suffering and careworn souls. Through him
it pleased Me to proclaim the worship of My mercy. And through this work of
mercy more souls will come close to Me than otherwise would have, even if he
had kept giving absolution day and night for the rest of his life, because by
so doing, he would have labored only for as long as he lived; whereas, thanks
to this work of mercy, he will be laboring till the end of the world.
1262 September 3. First
Friday of the month. During Holy Mass, I became united with God. Jesus gave me
to know that even the smallest thing does not happen on earth without His will.
After having seen this, my soul entered into an unusual repose; I found myself
completely at peace as to the work in its full extent. God can deal with me as
He pleases, and I will bless Him for everything.
1264 Act of total
abandonment to the will of God, which is for me, love and mercy itself.
Act of Oblation
Jesus-Host, whom I have this very moment received into my heart, through this union with You I offer myself to the heavenly Father as a sacrificial host, abandoning myself totally and completely to the most merciful and holy will of my God. From today onward, Your will, Lord, is my food. Take my whole being; dispose of me as You please. Whatever Your fatherly hand gives me, I will accept with submission, peace and joy. I fear nothing, no matter in what direction You lead me; helped by Your grace I will carry out everything You demand of me. I no longer fear any of Your inspirations nor do I probe anxiously to see where they will lead me. Lead me, O God, along whatever roads You please; I have placed all my trust in Your will which is, for me, love and mercy itself.
Bid me to stay in this convent, I will stay; bid me to undertake the work, I will undertake it; leave me in uncertainty about the work until I die, be blessed; give me death when, humanly speaking, my life seems particularly necessary, be blessed. Should You take me in my youth, be blessed; should You let me live to a ripe old age, be blessed. Should You give me health and strength, be blessed; should You confine me to a bed of pain for my whole life, be blessed. Should you give only failures and disappointments in life, be blessed. Should You allow my purest intentions to be condemned, be blessed. Should You enlighten my mind, be blessed. Should You leave me in darkness and all kinds of torments, be blessed.
From this moment on, I live in the deepest peace, because the Lord himself is carrying me in the hollow of His hand. He, Lord of unfathomable mercy, knows that I desire Him alone in all things, always and everywhere.
Act of Oblation
Jesus-Host, whom I have this very moment received into my heart, through this union with You I offer myself to the heavenly Father as a sacrificial host, abandoning myself totally and completely to the most merciful and holy will of my God. From today onward, Your will, Lord, is my food. Take my whole being; dispose of me as You please. Whatever Your fatherly hand gives me, I will accept with submission, peace and joy. I fear nothing, no matter in what direction You lead me; helped by Your grace I will carry out everything You demand of me. I no longer fear any of Your inspirations nor do I probe anxiously to see where they will lead me. Lead me, O God, along whatever roads You please; I have placed all my trust in Your will which is, for me, love and mercy itself.
Bid me to stay in this convent, I will stay; bid me to undertake the work, I will undertake it; leave me in uncertainty about the work until I die, be blessed; give me death when, humanly speaking, my life seems particularly necessary, be blessed. Should You take me in my youth, be blessed; should You let me live to a ripe old age, be blessed. Should You give me health and strength, be blessed; should You confine me to a bed of pain for my whole life, be blessed. Should you give only failures and disappointments in life, be blessed. Should You allow my purest intentions to be condemned, be blessed. Should You enlighten my mind, be blessed. Should You leave me in darkness and all kinds of torments, be blessed.
From this moment on, I live in the deepest peace, because the Lord himself is carrying me in the hollow of His hand. He, Lord of unfathomable mercy, knows that I desire Him alone in all things, always and everywhere.
1265 Prayer. O Jesus,
stretched out upon the cross, I implore You, give me the grace of doing
faithfully the most holy will of Your Father, in all things, always and
everywhere. And when this will of God will seem to me very harsh and difficult
to fulfill, it is then I beg You, Jesus, may power and strength flow upon me
from Your wounds, and may my lips keep repeating, "Your will be done, O
Lord." O Savior of the world, Lover of man's salvation, who in such
terrible torment and pain forget Yourself to think only of the salvation of
souls, O most compassionate Jesus, grant me the grace to forget myself that I
may live totally for souls, helping You in the work of salvation, according to
the most holy will of Your Father....
1266 August 5, [1937]. [209] The
Lord let me know how much our dear Mother Superior [Irene] is defending me
against... not only by prayer but also by deed. Thank You, Jesus, for this
grace. It will not go unrequited in my heart; when I am with Jesus, I do not
forget about her.
1267 September 6, 1937.
Today, I begin a new assignment. I go from the garden to the desert of the
gate. [210]
I went in to talk to the Lord for a while. I asked Him for a blessing and for
graces to faithfully carry out the duties entrusted to me. I heard these words:
My daughter, I am always with you. I have given you the opportunity to
practice deeds of mercy which you will perform according to obedience. You will
give Me much pleasure if, each evening, you will speak to Me especially about
this task. I felt that Jesus had given me a new grace in relation to my new
duties; but, despite this, I have locked myself deeper in His Heart.
1268 Today I felt more
ill, but Jesus has given me many more opportunities on this day to practice
virtue. It so happened that I was busier than usual, and the sister in charge
of the kitchen made it clear to me how irritated she was that I had come late
for dinner, although it was quite impossible for me to have come sooner. At any
rate, I felt so unwell that I had to ask Mother Superior to allow me to lie
down. I went to ask Sister N. to take my place, and again I got a scolding:
"What is this, Sister, you're so exhausted that you're going back to bed
again! Confound you with all this lying in bed!" I put up with all that,
but that wasn't the end. I still had to ask the sister who was in charge of the
sick to bring me my meal. When I told her this, she burst out of the chapel
into the corridor after me to give me a piece of her mind: "Why on earth
are you going to bed, Sister, etc...... I asked her not to bother bringing me
anything. I am writing all this very briefly because it is not my intention to
write about such things, and I am doing so merely to dissuade souls from
treating others in this way, for this is displeasing to the Lord. In a
suffering soul we should see Jesus Crucified, and not a loafer or burden on the
community. A soul who suffers with submission to the will of God draws down
more blessings on the whole convent than all the working sisters. Poor indeed
is a convent where there are no sick sisters. God often grants many and great
graces out of regard for the souls who are suffering, and He withholds many
punishments solely because of the suffering souls.
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-6, 18-19, 497)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-678, 724, 742, 954)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1180-1184, 1199-1200,
1202, 1204)
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1207-1208, 1237, 1239,
1241, 1244 )
(Diary of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-121255-1256, 1262,
1264-1268)
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