Excerpts from the
DIARY of Saint Faustina Kowalska
6 I am to write [3]
down the encounters of my soul with You, O God, at the moments of Your
special visitations. I am to write about You, O Incomprehensible in mercy
towards my poor soul. Your holy will is the life of my soul. I have
received this order through him who is for me Your representative here on earth,
who interprets Your holy Will to me. Jesus, You see how difficult it is for
me to write, how unable I am to put down clearly what I experience in my
soul. O God, can a pen write down that for which many a time there are no
words? But You give the order to write, O God; that is enough for me.
25 During the night, the Mother
of God visited me, holding the Infant Jesus in Her arms. My soul was filled
with joy, and I said, "Mary, my Mother, do You know how terribly I
suffer?" And the Mother of God answered me, I know how much you
suffer, but do not be afraid. I share with you your suffering, and I shall
always do so. She smiled warmly and disappeared. At once, strength and
a great courage sprang up anew in my soul; but that lasted only one day. It
seemed as though hell had conspired against me. A terrible hatred began to
break out in my soul, a hatred for all that is holy and divine. It seemed
to me that these spiritual torments would be my lot for the rest of my
life. I turned to the Blessed Sacrament and said to Jesus, "Jesus, my
Spouse, do You not see that my soul is dying because of its longing for
You? How can You hide Yourself from a heart that loves You so sincerely?
Forgive me, Jesus; may Your holy will be done in me. I will suffer silently
like a dove, without complaining. I will not allow my heart even one single
cry of sorrowful complaint."
68 The heaviest suffering for
me was that it seemed to me that neither my prayers nor my good works
were pleasing to God. I did not dare lift up my eyes to heaven. This
caused me such great suffering during the community exercises in the
chapel that one day Mother Superior [Raphael] called me aside after the
exercises and said to me, "Sister, ask God for grace and
consolation, because I can see for myself and the sisters keep telling me
that the very sight of you evokes pity. I really do not know what to do
with you, Sister. I command you to stop tormenting yourself for no
reason."
But all these conferences with Mother Superior brought me no relief, nor
did they clarify anything for me. Rather, even greater darkness hid God
from me. I looked for help in the confessional, but not even there did I
find it. A saintly priest wanted to help me, but I was so miserable that
I couldn't even define my trouble, and that vexed me even more. A deathly
sadness penetrated my soul to such an extent that I was unable to hide
it, and it was apparent to those around me. I lost hope. The night was
growing darker and darker. The priest to whom I went to confession said
to me, "I see very special graces in you, Sister, and I am not
worried about you at all; why are you torturing yourself in this
way?" But at that time I did not understand at all what he was
saying and was extremely surprised when, by way of penance, I was ordered
to say the Te Deum or the Magnificat, or to run fast around
the garden in the evening, or else to laugh out loud ten times a day.
These penances were very surprising to me; but even with that the priest
was not able to give me much help. Evidently, God wanted me to give Him
glory through suffering.
That priest consoled me, saying that in my present situation I was more
pleasing to God than if I were filled with the greatest consolations.
"It is a very great grace, Sister, "he told me, "that in
your present condition, with all the torments of soul you are
experiencing, you not only do not offend God, but you even try to
practice virtues. I am looking into your soul, and I see God's great
plans and special graces there; and seeing this, I give thanks to the
Lord." But despite all that, my soul was in a state of torture; and
in the midst of unspeakable torments, I imitated the blind man who
entrusts himself to his guide, holding his hand firmly, not giving up
obedience for a single moment, and this was my only safety in this fiery
trial.
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116 My Jesus, You know what my
soul goes through at the recollection of these sufferings. I have often
marveled that the angels and saints hold their peace at the sight of a soul
suffering like that. Yet they have special love for us at such moments. My
soul has often cried out after God, as a little child who cries as loudly
as he can when his mother covers her face and he cannot recognize her. O my
Jesus, honor and glory to You for these trials of love! Great and
incomprehensible is your mercy. All that You intended for my soul, O Lord,
is steeped in Your mercy.
161 Immaculate Virgin,
Pure crystal for my heart,
You are my strength, O sturdy anchor!
You are the weak heart's shield and protection.
Mary you are pure, of purity incomparable;
At once both Virgin and Mother,
You are beautiful as the sun, without blemish,
And your soul is beyond all comparison.
Your beauty has delighted the eye of the Thrice-Holy
One.
He descended from heaven, leaving His eternal throne,
And took Body and Blood of your heart
And for nine months lay hidden in a Virgin's Heart.
O Mother, Virgin, purest of all lilies,
Your heart was Jesus' first tabernacle on earth.
Only because no humility was deeper than yours
Were you raised above the choirs
of Angels and above all Saints.
220 O my eternal Lord and Creator, how am I going to
thank You for this great favor; namely, that You have deigned to choose
miserable me to be Your betrothed and that You are to unite me to yourself
in an eternal bond? O dearest Treasure of my heart, I offer You all the
adoration and thanksgiving of the Saints and of all the choirs of Angels,
and I unite myself in a special way with Your Mother. O Mary, my Mother, I
humbly beg of You, cover my soul with Your virginal cloak at this very
important moment of my life, so that thus I may become dearer to Your Son
and may worthily praise Your Son's mercy before the whole world and
throughout all eternity.
260 I had permission to visit
Czestochowa while on my journey. I saw the Mother of God [image] for the
first time, when I went to attend the unveiling of the image at five in the
morning. I prayed without interruption until eleven, and it seemed to me
that I had just come. The superior of the house there [Mother Serafin[75]] sent a sister for me, to tell me to come to
breakfast and said she was worried that I would miss my train. The Mother
of God told me many things. I entrusted my perpetual vows to Her. I felt
that I was her child and that She was my Mother. She did not refuse any of
my requests.
309 Before heaven and earth,
before all the choirs of Angels, before the Most Holy Virgin Mary, before
all the Powers of heaven, I declare to the One Triune God that today, in
union with Jesus Christ, Redeemer of souls, I make a voluntary offering of
myself for the conversion of sinners, especially for those souls who have
lost hope in God's mercy. This offering consists in my accepting, with
total subjection to God's will, all the sufferings, fears and terrors with
which sinners are filled. In return, I give them all the consolations which
my soul receives from my communion with God. In a word, I offer everything
for them: Holy Masses, Holy Communions, penances, mortifications, prayers.
I do not fear the blows, blows of divine justice, because I am united with
Jesus. O my God, in this way I want to make amends to You for the souls
that do not trust in Your goodness. I hope against all hope in the ocean of
Your mercy. My Lord and my God, my portion-my portion forever, I do not
base this act of oblation on my own strength, but on the strength that
flows from the merits of Jesus Christ. I will daily repeat this act of
self-oblation by pronouncing the following prayer which You yourself have
taught me, Jesus:
"O Blood and Water which gushed forth from the Heart of Jesus as a
Fount of Mercy for us, I trust in You!"
316 Once, the Mother of God came
to visit me. She was sad. Her eyes were cast down. She made it clear that
She wanted to say something, and yet, on the other hand, it was as if She
did not want to speak to me about it. When I understood this, I began to
beg the Mother of God to tell me and to look at me. Just then Mary looked
at me with a warm smile and said, You are going to experience certain
sufferings because of an illness and the doctors; you will also suffer much
because of the image, but do not be afraid of anything. The next day I
fell ill and suffered a great deal, just as the Mother of God had told me.
But my soul was ready for the sufferings. Suffering is a constant companion
of my life.
497 O Eternal Truth, Word Incarnate, who
most faithfully fulfilled Your Father's will, today I am becoming a martyr
of Your inspirations, since I cannot carry them out because I have no will
of my own, though interiorly I see Your will clearly. I submit in
everything to the will of my superiors and my confessor. I will follow Your
will insofar as You will permit me to do so through Your representative. O
my Jesus, it cannot be helped, but I give priority to the voice of the
Church over the voice with which You speak to me.
564 On the feast day of the Immaculate Conception of the
Mother of God, during Holy Mass, I heard the rustling of garments and saw
the most holy Mother of God in a most beautiful radiance. Her white garment
was girdled with a blue sash. She said to me, You give Me great joy
when you adore the Holy Trinity for the graces and privileges which were
accorded Me. And She immediately disappeared.
620 Mary is my Instructress, who
is ever teaching me how to live for God. My spirit brightens up in Your
gentleness and Your humility, O Mary.
635 March 25. In the morning,
during meditation, God's presence enveloped me in a special way, as I saw
the immeasurable greatness of God and, at the same time, His condescension
to His creatures. Then I saw the Mother of God, who said to me, Oh, how
pleasing to God is the soul that follows faithfully the inspirations of His
grace! I gave the Savior to the world; as for you, you have to speak to the
world about His great mercy and prepare the world for the Second Coming of
Him who will come, not as a merciful Savior, but as a just Judge. Oh, how
terrible is that day! Determined is the day of justice, the day of divine
wrath. The angels tremble before it. Speak to souls about this great mercy
while it is still the time for [granting] mercy. If you keep silent now,
you will be answering for a great number of souls on that terrible day.
Fear nothing. Be faithful to the end. I sympathize with you.
Immaculate Conception of the Mother of God.
805 From early morning, I felt the nearness of the
Blessed Mother. During Holy Mass, I saw Her, so lovely and so beautiful
that I have no words to express even a small part of this beauty. She was
all [in] white, with a blue sash around Her waist. Her cloak was also blue,
and there was a crown on Her head. Marvelous light streamed forth from Her
whole figure. I am the Queen of heaven and earth, but especially
the Mother of your [Congregation]. She pressed me to Her heart and
said, I feel constant compassion for you. I felt the force of Her
Immaculate Heart which was communicated to my soul. Now I understand why I
have been preparing for this feast for two months and have been looking forward
to it with such yearning. From today onwards, I am going to strive for the
greatest purity of soul, that the rays of God's grace may be reflected in
all their brilliance. I long to be a crystal in order to find favor in His
eyes.
843 December 24, [1936]. During Holy Mass today, I was
united in a particular way with God and His Immaculate Mother. The humility
and love of the Immaculate Virgin penetrated my soul. The more I imitate
the Mother of God, the more deeply I get to know God. Oh, what infinite longing
envelops my soul! Jesus, how can You still leave me in this exile? I am
dying of longing for You. Every touch of my soul by You wounds me
immensely. Love and suffering go together; yet I would not exchange this
pain caused by You for any treasure, because it is the pain of
incomprehensible delights, and these wounds of the soul are inflicted by a
loving hand.
874 Mary, Immaculate Virgin, take me under Your special
protection and guard the purity of my soul, heart and body. You are the
model and star of my life.
1097 Since that time, I have been living under the
virginal ', cloak of the Mother of God. She has been guarding me and
instructing me. I am quite at peace, close to Her Immaculate Heart. Because
I am so weak and inexperienced, I nestle like a little child close to Her
heart.
+ J. M. J.
1232 O sweet Mother of God,
I model my life on You;
You are for me the bright dawn;
In You I lose myself, enraptured.
O Mother, Immaculate Virgin,
In You the divine ray is reflected,
Midst storms, 'tis You who teach me to love the Lord,
O my shield and defense from the foe.
Cracow, August 10, 1937.
1410 Today [December 7, 1937] is the eve of the Feast of
the Immaculate Conception of the Virgin Mary. During the midday meal, in an
instant, God gave me to know the greatness of my destiny; that is, His
closeness, which for all eternity will not be taken away from me, and He
did this in such a vivid and clear fashion that I remained wrapped up in
His living presence for a long time, humbling myself before His greatness.
+ J.M.J.
1412 + It is with great zeal that I have prepared for
the celebration of the Feast of the
Immaculate Conception of the Mother of God. I have made
an extra effort to keep
recollected in spirit and have meditated on that unique
privilege of Our Lady. And thus my heart was completely drowned in Her,
thanking God for having accorded this great privilege to Mary.
1413 I prepared not only by means of the novena said in
common by the whole community, but I also made a personal effort to salute
Her a thousand times each day, saying a thousand "Hail Mary's"
for nine days in Her praise.
+ This is now the third time I have said such a novena
to the Mother of God; that is, a novena made up of a thousand Aves each
day. Thus the novena consists in nine thousand salutations. Although I have
done this now three times in my life, and two of these while in the course
of my duties, I have never failed in carrying out my tasks with the
greatest exactitude. I have always said the novena outside the time of my
exercises; that is to say, I have not said the Aves during Holy Mass or
Benediction. Once, I made the novena while lying ill in the hospital. Where
there's a will, there's a way. Apart from recreation, I have only prayed
and worked. I have not said a single unnecessary word during these days.
Although I must admit that such a matter requires a good deal of attention
and effort, nothing is too much when it comes to honoring the Immaculate
Virgin.
1414 The Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Before Holy
Communion I saw the Blessed Mother inconceivably beautiful. Smiling at me
She said to me, My daughter, at God's command I am to be, in a
special and exclusive way your Mother; but I desire that you, too, in a
special way, be My child.
1415 I desire, My dearly beloved daughter, that you
practice the three virtues that are dearest to Me-and most pleasing to God.
The first is humility, humility, and once again humility; the second
virtue, purity; the third virtue, love of God. As My daughter, you must
especially radiate with these virtues. When the conversation ended, She
pressed me to Her Heart and disappeared. When I regained the use of
my senses, my heart became so wonderfully attracted to these
virtues; and I practice them faithfully. They are as though engraved in my
heart.
1477 When, during Vespers, the Magnificat
was being sung and they came to the words, "He has shown the strength
of His arm," a profound spirit of recollection enveloped my soul, and
I understood that the Lord would soon accomplish His work in my soul. 230 I am not surprised now that the Lord did not disclose
everything to me at first.
1742 Be praised, merciful God, One God in the Holy
Trinity,
Unfathomable, infinite, incomprehensible,
immersing themselves in You, their minds cannot comprehend You,
So they repeat without end their eternal: Holy.
Be glorified, O merciful Creator of ours, O Lord,
Omnipotent, but full of compassion, inconceivable.
To love You is the mission of our existence,
Singing our eternal hymn: Holy...
Be blessed, merciful God, Eternal Love.
You are above the heavens, the saphires, the firmaments.
The host of pure spirits sings You praises,
With its eternal hymn: Thrice Holy.
And, gazing upon You, face to face, O God,
I see that You could have called other creatures before them.
Therefore they humble themselves before You in great humility,
For well they see that this grace comes solely from Your mercy.
One of the most beautiful spirits would not recognize Your mercy,
And, blinded by his pride, he drew others after him.
Angel of great beauty, he became Satan
And was cast down in one moment from heaven's heights into hell.
Then the faithful spirits cried, "Glory to God's mercy!"
And they stood firm in spite of the fiery test.
Glory to Jesus, the Christ abased,
Glory to His Mother, the humble and pure Virgin.
After this battle, the pure spirits plunged into the ocean of Divinity;
Contemplating and praising the depths of His mercy,
They drown in His mercy and manifold light,
Possessing in knowledge the Trinity of Persons, the Oneness of Godhead.
+The Infinite Goodness of God in Sending Us His
Only-Begotten Son.
1745 God, You did not destroy man after his fall, but in Your mercy You
forgave him, You forgave in a divine way; that is, not only have You absolved
him from guilt, but You have bestowed upon him every grace. Mercy has moved
You to deign to descend among us and lift us up from our misery. God will
descend to earth; the Immortal Lord of lords will abase Himself. But where
will You descend, Lord; will it be to the temple of Solomon? Or will You
have a new tabernacle built for Yourself? Where do You intend to come down?
O Lord, what kind of tabernacle shall we prepare for You, since the whole
earth is Your footstool?
You have indeed prepared a tabernacle for Yourself: the Blessed Virgin. Her
Immaculate Womb is Your dwelling place, and the inconceivable miracle of
Your mercy takes place, O Lord. The Word becomes flesh; God dwells among
us, the Word of God, Mercy Incarnate. By Your descent, You have lifted us
up to Your divinity. Such is the excess of Your love, the abyss of Your
mercy. Heaven is amazed at the superabundance of Your love. No one fears to
approach You now. You are the God of mercy. You have compassion on misery.
You are our God, and we are Your people. You are our Father, and we are
Your children by grace. Praise be to Your mercy, that You have deigned to
descend among us.
1746 Be adored, O God of mercy,
Because You have deigned to descend from heaven to earth.
Most humbly we adore You
For Your having vouchsafed to exalt all mankind.
Unfathomable and incomprehensible in Your mercy,
For love of us You take on flesh
From the Immaculate Virgin, ever untouched by sin,
Because You have willed it so from all ages.
The Blessed Virgin, that Snow-White Lily,
Is first to praise the omnipotence of Your mercy.
Her pure heart opens with love for the coming of the Word;
She believes the words of God's messenger and is confirmed in trust.
Heaven is astounded that God has become man,
That there is on earth a heart worthy of God Himself.
Why is it that You do not unite Yourself with a Seraph, but with a sinner,
O Lord?
Oh, because, despite the purity of the virginal womb, this is a mystery of
Your mercy.
O mystery of God's mercy, O God of compassion,
That You have deigned to leave the heavenly throne
And to stoop down to our misery, to human weakness,
For it is not the angels, but man who needs mercy.
To give worthy praise to the Lord's mercy,
We unite ourselves with Your Immaculate Mother,
For then our hymn will be more pleasing to You,
Because She is chosen from among men and angels.
Through Her, as through a pure crystal,
Your mercy was passed on to us.
Through Her, man became pleasing to God;
Through Her, streams of grace flowed down upon us.
+ God's Infinite Goodness in Redeeming Man.
1747 God, You could have saved thousands of worlds with one word; a single
sigh from Jesus would have satisfied Your justice. But You Yourself, Jesus,
purely out of love for us, underwent such a terrible Passion. Your Father's
justice would have been propitiated with a single sigh from You, and all
Your self-abasement is solely the work of Your mercy and Your inconceivable
love. On leaving the earth, O Lord, You wanted to stay with us, and so You
left us Yourself in the Sacrament of the Altar, and You opened wide Your
mercy to us. There is no misery that could exhaust You; You have called us
all to this fountain of love, to this spring of God's compassion. Here is
the tabernacle of Your mercy, here is the remedy for all our ills. To You,
O living spring of mercy, all souls are drawn; some like deer, thirsting
for Your love, others to wash the wound of their sins, and still others,
exhausted by life, to draw strength. At the moment of Your death on the
Cross, You bestowed upon us eternal life; allowing Your most holy side to
be opened, You opened an inexhaustible spring of mercy for us, giving us
Your dearest possession, the Blood and Water from Your Heart. Such is the
omnipotence of Your mercy. From it all grace flows to us.
1748 Be adored, O God, in the work of Your mercy,
Be blessed by all faithful hearts
On whom Your gaze rests,
In whom dwells Your immortal life.
O my Jesus, have mercy, sorrowful was Your life on this earth,
And in terrible torment Your work came to an end,
Hanging stretched out on the wood of the Cross,
And all this for the love of our souls.
In Your inconceivable love, You allowed Your most holy side to be opened,
And streams of Blood and Water gushed forth from Your Heart.
Here is the living fountain of Your mercy,
Here souls receive consolation and refreshment.
In the Blessed Sacrament, You left us Your mercy;
Your love deigned to arrange it so,
That, going through life, suffering and toil,
I might never doubt of Your goodness and mercy.
For even if the whole world's miseries weighed on my soul,
We must not doubt for even a moment,
But have trust in the power of God's mercy,
Because, with graciousness, God receives a contrite soul.
O unspeakable mercy of our Lord,
Source of compassion and all sweetness,
Trust, trust, O soul, though you are stained by sin,
For when you approach God, you will not taste bitterness.
Because He is a living fire of great love,
When we approach Him with sincerity,
Our miseries, sins and evil deeds vanish;
He will settle our debts when we surrender ourselves to Him.
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-I-6, 25, 68, 116, 161, 220, 260, 309,
316)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-II-497, 564, 620, 635, 805, 843, 874)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-III-1097)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-IV-1232, 1244)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-V-1410, 1412-1414)
(Diary
of Sister Faustina Kowalska Notebook-VI-1742, 1745-1748)
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